View Full Version : Simple HUGE change making an impact
I made the decision in October to rid myself and my home/family of 50% of the things in our home. I never really started with a count but I just went more by feel and I think I can say I have accomplished it. I literally went through every drawer, box, closet, trunk, shelf, whatever I could get my hands on and in, to clean it out. No space or spot was left unturned. The purpose of this mission was actually something I have been wanting to do for a long time. I recalled when I lived in a smaller space with less stuff, I was just more productive in my own single life, so I am taking that same approach in my married with child life now.
And it's begun to work it's magic. One I cleaned out, I painted the kitchen and finally hung the curtains. It is so peaceful and pulled together in there and such a pleasure to be in there now. And of all things, I painted it a dark grey with a touch of brown in it and it's fabulous. This spilled over to painting the master bathroom and bedroom and hanging the curtains in there. We also go rid of our 2 dressers and took the money we made on them to purchase a professional closet system for our Master. EVERYTHING, coats, fits in there and I love it!!! And our bedroom is very zen now, with just the bed, 2 lamps on small tables and the dog bed. I LOVE IT TOO!!!
In my career life, I have helped out with the opening of a clinic and am helping planning a second event in December. No pay but getting out there and making it happen. I now have the energy to focus on what is important to me. With the holidays coming up, it's nice to have an organized, neat home that allows us to go live our lives without worry.
I am here to say it can happen, sometimes you just have a to take a BIG leap of faith and do it!!!
iris lilies
11-15-14, 1:21pm
Great report! We hadn't heard from you a while, so it's good that you popped in to give an update.
I like bedrooms that have only a bed with everything else hidden away behind clean closed doors of a closet.
Aww thanks Iris!!! I have been knee deep in STUFF and paint buckets :) As soon as I think to do it, I may post pics. :)
Simplemind
11-15-14, 1:31pm
Sounds like bliss.:)
iris lilies
11-15-14, 1:36pm
Aww thanks Iris!!! I have been knee deep in STUFF and paint buckets :) As soon as I think to do it, I may post pics. :)
Oh please do!
Sadly, I am ALSO attracted to bedrooms that have beautiful, curated fabrics in rich colors displayed in artsy ways. I think of it as the "gypsy caravan" look which is, by definition, cluttered. Personally I can't do that because I have animal hair everywhere, and every piece of fabric that I have must be washable. But in my alternate life, that's my bedroom! I was looking through Realtor.com last night at houses in Venice beach, CA and came across this charmingly decorated house. Here's the bedroom:
http://p.rdcpix.com/v04/l98ffae44-m16o.jpg
The entire house is fantasy style, exactly what I like:
http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/1525-Glencoe-Ave_Venice_CA_90291_M19875-79796?row=15
Sorry to hijack your thread about minimalist decor into a discussion of cluttered stuff! It's just what I was pondering last night, my urge for minimal vs. my urge to have cosy/cluttered. I really like a mix of textures and I can't reconcile that with minimalist, I guess.
frugal-one
11-15-14, 2:05pm
DH just told me today that he thinks I have a hard time getting rid of stuff. I think he is right, especially books and magazines. I have a few piles (actually more than a few). I did go through my clothes and discard 2 large bags recently. I never used to be this way. I would discard things and have EVERYTHING tidy. I do clear things out when company comes but put it back when they leave. Had people over yesterday and they commented that I am "plain or simple" in my furnishings. I take that as a compliment. However, I think I should get rid of much, much more. Now to pysch myself up to do just that!
Teacher Terry
11-15-14, 2:11pm
Greenmama: it sounds like you have made great progress:cool:. IL: that bedroom is beautiful! Frugal-one: the more you get rid of the easier it gets.
lessisbest
11-15-14, 2:24pm
GreenMama you are an inspiration. We've been doing the same thing in anticipation of retirement and down-sizing. Everyday I go through something and make sure I load up the give-away box as well as the amazing stuff that goes directly into the trash. We were inspired last weekend when we went to an estate tag sale. These people must have canceled trash pick-up years ago because most of their stuff was mostly "trash".
We went through the accumulation of Christmas "stuff" stored in the basement this morning and got it down to 2 boxes from 6. I added a number of sweaters and other garments that are too big for me (weight-loss due to going gluten-free).
We're being pretty ruthless with what stays and what goes:
-Do we use this item?
-Does it have sentimental attachment?
-Does it have more than one use?
-Does it add anything to home/life?
-Does it belong in this room?
-When was the last time I wore/used it?
-Do we even know what is IN this storage box anymore?
Several years ago we donated our antique bedroom furniture, which would have looked great in iris lilies fantasy room above, to the auction for Hospice. It was beautiful, but we're much happier with less fussy furnishings that are easy to move and care for.
Iris Lily, that's a gorgeous house. California seems to have lots of dreamy mid-century houses with multiple windows. I like "gypsy caravan" decor as well as semi-minimalist with views, fabrics, and color.
I'm currently in the midst of going through all my paper, shredding and bagging much of it to recycle. It's incredible how many clear garbage bags full of stuff are being filled. I've found shopping lists from ten years ago. I hope eventually to get rid of every thing not useful, beautiful, or loved.
I'm really jealous, that's wonderful!
I have to ask a question here. I would love to do the Fearless 50, but in my world, this means I would be the only person responsible for any of it. If I move it, if I choose to discard it, if I box it up because it's been sitting in a pile for six months, then I become The Curator Of The Crap. And the remaining 50% just surges in to take up the newly clean space anyway. It's super frustrating because I hate cluttered space but I guess it's preferable to huge effort + clutter anyway, and definitely preferable to cataloging the location of myriad things I couldn't care less about.
So ... is your family on the same page, or have you just put your foot down and said enough is enough? How do you pass the responsibility to the person who should have it?
Greenmama, your post is inspiring---congratulations on your success.
Oh please do!
Sorry to hijack your thread about minimalist decor into a discussion of cluttered stuff! It's just what I was pondering last night, my urge for minimal vs. my urge to have cosy/cluttered. I really like a mix of textures and I can't reconcile that with minimalist, I guess.
Funny about one (wo)man's poison, the first thing I thought when looking at your fantasy pic was, what lovely windows, I'd immediately remove everything else! :~)
Kib- My hubby doesn't really care as long as I am not just chucking stuff to get rid of it. What I found is have family involved. I gave hubby a huge pile of his paperwork..we are talking about 2 boxes full and he went through it. I then organized what was left.
My DS, he is almost 9, is pretty good about cleaning out. He loves his Legos, stuffed animals, books and art supplies. The rest of the stuff that he picks up, stuff from birthday parties, etc..he will go through on a monthly basis. As paperwork from school comes in, we deal with it together.
I find if I sit both of them down and give them a 20 minute project, it gets done.
Let me say, we probably had far less than the average bears before we started but there is always room for improvement. I have natural tendencies towards organizing, so I don't mind so much, as long as someone can help me sort. I say play up your families strengths. My son will take out the trash, hubby takes the stuff to donation for me. It works for us. I also find scheduling the time you are going to do it helps. I literally put it on my calendar for a certain amount of time and put a general area I wanted to accomplish. I find this helps tremendously.
Lessisbest- we took the downsizing/retirement idea to heart.
We are only 40 and 43 but we thought HMMM...how would we live if we retired today? Our next move, in the next 3-5 years, is to find a nice small townhouse closer to the city for us.
And here is my truths, so you don't think I am such the minimalist. I love clothes and shoes, so I have a full closet of clothes and shoes. I have to dress very sharp for my current work (we are talking business professional with a little bit of fun because I work in a creative career now) and at home, it's jeans and t-shirts but a little polished because I run a lot of weekend events, so casual polished??? :) But also have a very distinct color palette- charcoal grays, cherry red, navy blue, black of course, dark camel colors, a smattering of deep purple and hot pink. Sounds like a lot but what I have found is that I have way more outfit choices because I can intermingle items. I wear very plain clothes, for the most part, but perk them up with interesting materials. I just bought a nice black, lined sheath dress but it has faux leather on it (it's way cooler than I can describe). With a simple silver watch and my diamond studs and black boots, out the door in 5 minutes and look pulled together.
I also like to decorate for Christmas and Halloween, my 2 favorite holidays. I did prune out my decorations and did a little more classic Halloween this year- with purple and orange lights, a few pumpkins and I used the hay I had to protect my front garden as decor. I got rid of the plastic bats and cats. I did keep my color changing ghost. I love him.
Christmas- I have not hit up that stuff yet as it doesn't come down until the end of the month. I have a plan for this year, so I am sure there will be a few things going. I probably have 2-3 bins of Christmas stuff. I do like sparkle!!!
What I don't have- a collection of anything (well I guess besides my clothes). I am not a collector of things, chotkies, whatever you want to call them.
We've been thinking about doing this ourselves. We built our house 19 years ago and started out in a fairly minimal manner, but after all this time, things have accumulated to the point that we'd both like to just get rid of most of it. Part of our inspiration is our desire to retire in a few years, move to a smaller home to be used as our base and hit the road for months at a time in our motorhome. When the time comes to make that move, I'd love to already be pared down to just the essentials.
Maybe I'll start with the garage. Right now I can't get my car into it as my space is filled with bikes, lawn equipment and various stuff that's seemingly appeared from nowhere since the spring.
Sounds like a great plan Alan.
Our future plan is to find a small cottage down along the Texas Gulf Coast- less than 1000 square feet and use that as a base when we retire. We want to do some travelling as well.
I found once I got going, it was easier. That first load out after the garage sale was HUGE and I wish I had that in the sale but oh well.
We are also focusing more on our health now, so we don't want to spend all day Saturday cleaning, washing, folding, organizing. The laundry still takes us 2 days to knock out but we had a crazy system that works for us now.
I will get pics as soon as I get the rest of my window coverings up and my items put back on the walls. I want to have a complete look.
ToomuchStuff
11-15-14, 5:17pm
I was hoping to do more of the shedding during the summer, but what I am finding is with the cold weather, I am getting more done inside, now.
Gardenarian
11-15-14, 5:34pm
I have to ask a question here. I would love to do the Fearless 50, but in my world, this means I would be the only person responsible for any of it. If I move it, if I choose to discard it, if I box it up because it's been sitting in a pile for six months, then I become The Curator Of The Crap. And the remaining 50% just surges in to take up the newly clean space anyway.
Yes, this is so frustrating! Then dh and dd say, "well, you're the one who cares about things being tidy." But they come to me when they lose stuff...
mmm hmm. I really sometimes wonder what that's about. "I have to buy more ____ because (oh is that the slightest accusation I hear?) we don't have any." "It's on the shelf with similar items, in categories like "spices", so we know where to find it." "No, we don't have any, I looked." And I get up and there it is, it's just that the bottle was turned around so he couldn't see the label. WTF. What exactly does he SEE when he's theoretically "looking"? I'm not entirely just bitching here; there has got to be some different way of processing visual info and organizing that I just don't understand. :confused:
rosarugosa
11-15-14, 6:46pm
Good work, GreenMama!
Alan, My shed has the same syndrome as your garage (we don't have a garage).
Our house is less than 1000 SF, and I try to edit/cull on an ongoing basis, and be a good gatekeeper about what comes in. I'm planning to do some major culling over the winter. I would rather play outside when the weather is warmer.
It is not easy, believe me. I have had 10 years to train my husband :confused: (still working on that) and my son is young and learning. So I choose my battles. It's not easy but ya know.
Even my make up bag has lessened up. I literally started over with my process. I did strip back for 3 months to practically nothing. Now I have learned a more dewy, natural look with mascara, liquid blush and a lip stain along with a little concealer for around my eyes. I also have some bronzer to be glowy. I do have an eyeliner and an eye palette left that I want to use up. Again, learning less is more but I still want to look or maybe feel a certain way.
I will say, I started with my own stuff, then worked on DS and then DH.
iris lilies
11-15-14, 6:53pm
mmm hmm. I really sometimes wonder what that's about. "I have to buy more ____ because (oh is that the slightest accusation I hear?) we don't have any." "It's on the shelf with similar items, in categories like "spices", so we know where to find it." "No, we don't have any, I looked." And I get up and there it is, it's just that the bottle was turned around so he couldn't see the label. WTF. What exactly does he SEE when he's theoretically "looking"? I'm not entirely just bitching here; there has got to be some different way of processing visual info and organizing that I just don't understand. :confused:
oh I don't know, as the one in my household who can't find things, I admit that I have lazily ceded that role to The Finder. He is very good at finding things and he enjoys that role. So it's kinda out of laziness that I am unable to find things. Perhaps you are giving your SO unnecessary benefit of the doubt.
Our conversations will go like this:
me: would you please get a lb of hamburger from the freezer downstairs? (note that The Finder is also The Storage Master of food items in our basement, be they piles of squash, onions in crates, apples in the downstairs fridge, meat in the big freezer or whatever. He does not want me to mess with any of that. He has a system dammit! haha)
him: but I brought up 2 lbs last week.
me: but I looked and didn't see any hamburger in our kitchen freezer
him: ok.
and then he walks over to the kitchen freezer, rummages around in it, and find the hamburg
He is pleased to have "beat" me, I am pleased that dinner prep can proceed. We are happy.
I've just started going through our things again as Move #28 is looming on the horizon. Most of my clothes will go as they have simply worn out, some will be rags for cleaning, most not in good enough condition to donate.
mmm hmm. I really sometimes wonder what that's about. "I have to buy more ____ because (oh is that the slightest accusation I hear?) we don't have any." "It's on the shelf with similar items, in categories like "spices", so we know where to find it." "No, we don't have any, I looked." And I get up and there it is, it's just that the bottle was turned around so he couldn't see the label. WTF. What exactly does he SEE when he's theoretically "looking"? I'm not entirely just bitching here; there has got to be some different way of processing visual info and organizing that I just don't understand. :confused:
When my husband can't find something I know is where he's looking, I ask him, "Did you LOOK, LOOK or did you just Michael look?"
Begrudgingly he goes back, actually LOOK, LOOKs and there it is :)
Yes, you do sound a lot like us, roles reversed. Some day I'd probably beat you senseless with a frozen leg of lamb. :~)
Maybe the difference is that I'm not pleased to "win" in the run and fetch competition, I just feel used and disrespected, like my way of life is constantly challenged and over-ridden. I accept it when it's a shared goal like dinner, but that's almost never the case. If you'd just left the muddy jodhpurs I put on the dining table last week alooooone, I wouldn't be aaaasking you about them. Right, because nothing says I love you like filthy clothes in my food. For a week. Or however long you decide to leave them there.
ETA: it was an exaggerated example but that's how I feel about cluttery mess in a space I share with someone, stuff I have to stare at every day until I do the work of moving it: it's disrespectful and arrogant.
Ha Kib ain't that the truth!!! There are time, I just pile my hubby's clothes on his side of the bed. He usually gets the hint. Same with my son. I will pile it in his room and he has to find something, He is learning too. :)
I understand the whole disrespect thing and I have brought it up before to my husband.
To give you an idea so you know I am human- we have an 1800 square foot home, w/ 3 bedrooms, loft, 2 full bath, 1 half bath, living room, dining area/kitchen. Not huge but not small. Well a few weeks ago I had it with the bathrooms. Why do I end up cleaning ALL 3 and I only use 1, especially when one got particularly nasty. I had an all out meltdown to the point I put duct tape across the smaller bathroom in protest. They got the hint and cleaned all 3. Same with dishes. I don't get how I can wake up in the morning and there be a PILE of dishes from 8 hours prior. That said, I washed mine and when there were no more clean forks (Yes I did hide mine in the towel drawer for a day or so) he got the message. There have been instances like this over the last 10 years. Slowly it gets better and sometimes, I just have to put my foot down and be the angry one but I don't feel guilty because as you say, it's not fair for 1 person and what is that teaching my son?
And then there is the fact I had to teach him how to clean. His mother did EVERYTHING so at 32 he learned to clean house when he married me. I can't blame him for that and he was open to learning. So it's give and take.
Lol. Thank you, Green Mama. I don't think it's quite intentional, but that doesn't change the outraging entitlement factor. Nice to know someone else has these issues and some good ideas.
I am amazed that you are doing this purge at a relatively young age. We just got another huge property tax increase so the reality of having to move is staring us in the face. Which of course means..time to purge even if we don't know yet where we will end up. My frustration lately is that we have a lot of antiques which are not in vogue right now so not able to even give them away. I keep moving them around but don't really want them anymore. Not ready just yet to donate them. I also have a hard time motivating DH to assist with all this purging stuff. He has a vast camera collection, bazillions of lenses and miscellaneous parts but doesn't have the inertia to go through it all.
Pinkytoe- after cleaning out a fourth house belonging to semi-hoarders after their passing, I am very aware of what I own. I do not want to leave that burden on my son, if I can avoid it. Our intention is to find a small home, I would take a hut if they had a safe one, near the coast. Literally take our clothes, the box of pics, I have a few mementos from my son, our health related items, and what personal hygiene and cooking items we need, the cars and a have fun attitude. Cue Jimmy Buffet!!!
pinkytoe
11-16-14, 12:20am
Every once in a while I too dream of a little house on the coast - Rockport or Port A.
:DOh Pinkytoe...maybe we could get a duplex together because I love that area too!! :)
Teacher Terry
11-16-14, 7:59pm
My hubby will never get rid of things. If I tell him to sort to give away things he will sort all day & have maybe one small bag. He also when we first got together would put his crap everywhere. I trained him to keep his mess in his office & his huge shed. However, he will never purge but he does go out of town on business occasionally & that's when the magic happens. I learned by moving a lot as a adult with 5 people you have to purge once in awhile which is what I do.
There was a discussion on the Studebaker Forum the other day, about what to do with old V8 water pumps. See, the pump itself does not wear out--only the seal and bushings. Yet, there is a vendor who offers all-new, USA-made water pumps for a reasonable price--for the time being. Some guys were gleefully taking the position--"Oh, I just pitch 'em"; end of story; keep things neat and tidy, live for today. While others were more cautious--maintaining that the old pumps CAN be rebuilt, with readily-available generic parts, and that might be necessary someday if the supplier of new ones discontinues them. So, the consensus is: keep 'em if you have storage space; or give 'em to someone that does. But don't just scrap 'em.
My hubby will never get rid of things. If I tell him to sort to give away things he will sort all day & have maybe one small bag. He also when we first got together would put his crap everywhere. I trained him to keep his mess in his office & his huge shed. However, he will never purge but he does go out of town on business occasionally & that's when the magic happens. I learned by moving a lot as a adult with 5 people you have to purge once in awhile which is what I do. I struggle back and forth because DH pushed for this tiny house with a huge private studio building which is his office/man cave. He has about 1/3 of the total sq foot of real estate here as his personal space. I have a 10*10 room, 1/15 of the space. Which means that there is basically no space in our main house that is "his". So he has to actually go out in the yard if he wants to just set his stuff any old place, which is maybe pushing it a little, I start to feel like one of those housewives from the 1950's, thundering, "I Just Cleaned!"
Yeah L Packy, I hear you. The thing is, if you're never going to actually use something, just hold onto it til you die while it becomes another Thing to take care of or eats up your space, then it isn't worth anything. Not like I don't have the same problem, it's really, really hard to accept that and let go of something that could, theoretically, in another universe, be really useful. I have found with DH that "guy stuff" seems easier to pass on to others, he's always finding someone just dying for a new motorcycle jacket or the original muffler of something or other.
Teacher Terry
11-16-14, 9:20pm
Kib, your post made me laugh out loud. I say since he wanted the small house that he needs to be neater or retreat to his man cave:~). Of course I know that is easier said then done. He has the bigger office because he has so much junk & I have the small one which also doubles as a guest room. What's wrong with this picture? I guess we all sacrifice for marital harmony.
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