Kid's birthdays

[Gardenarian]

Hi - I'm wondering what you all do for your kids' birthdays.

DD will be turning 12 soon. She is having her best friend sleep over, and the next day I'm taking them out for a special tea party. For gifts, it's entirely clothing and books. I'm lucky that her birthday is halfway through the year - I can give practical gifts (clothes, books, camping gear, musical equipment, art supplies, etc.) both for Xmas and birthday.

Anyhow, I'm feeling a little guilt - that I'm not doing enough, that I'm not making things as "special" as they should be. I will also be making cupcakes for a few of her homeschool classes so she can celebrate with them as well.

What's enough? Too much? What's really fun?
Thanks!

[Float On]

As I mentioned in the 'traditions' tread - I decorate their room in the wee hours of the night with crepe paper streamers and helium balloons and a gift on their bed to find when they wake up. That gift is usually a book or some money wrapped up crazy. Then because we live in a tourist town and their birthdays are in the summer (which means it is hard to plan a party with friends) - we play tourist for the day as a family. They can pick an activity or two and lunch out. Then it is back home for cake or pie of choice and gifts from relatives. We're more into spending the time together and doing fun things than buying stuff.

[Mrs-M]

I think you've more than outdone yourself Gardenarian. Birthday celebrations in our house consist of the invite of neighbourhood kids along with family, there's always a birthday cake for the lucky one, presents, and a barbecue with all the fixings. (Pop, chips, hot-dogs, hamburgers, jello, ice cream).

[Stella]

Lovely ideas! I am all over the map on birthdays actually. I grew up with huge birthday extravaganzas and I won't lie. I loved it. One year my mom had the principal pretend I was in trouble and call me to the office. There were flowers waiting for me there and a limo waiting outside with all of my friends inside waiting to take us to a hotel with a pool for a sleepover. I actually had thirds surprise parties in a row in my teens and I fell for it every time.

When I was nine and wanted to be an astronaut my mom made me 10 cakes, the sun and the (then) nine planets. Saturn and Uranus had rings made of cake. The frosting was swirled to look like the actual planets. Jupiter had it's red spot. Cake boss has nothing on my mom. I got hundreds of dollars in gifts each year.

My mom has left me nowhere to go. :) Well, not true actually as she took my nephew to Spain for his ninth birthday and plans to take my kids to Europe when they are about 9 years old too.

My birthday parties for the kids are big, but usually pretty simple. Cheyenne's birthday is in March so her parties tend to be a little more elaborate because it's March in Minnesota and we all need something cheery. I have done tea parties, a roller skating party and one year we went to a waterpark hotel because our brains were about to explode from an excess of winter. :) Bella and James usually have
outdoor parties because they have summer birthdays. Most years Bella has had a pool party. This year she wants a canoe party.

My grandma and James have birthdays a few days apart so to distract people from celebrating her birthday she is apparently starting a trend of throwing him a party every year. Last years was a big family picnic by the river. She and my great aunt "don't like to fuss" but last years picnic involved two champagne turkeys, five kinds
of salads, three kinds of fruits, two desserts, homemade rolls, and two cakes. Guess who's mother that Grandma is? :)

Travis is an April Fools Day baby. I am going to make the most of that until he's old enough to demand that I knock it off. I already have plans for his first birthday to make ice cream cone cupcakes (cupcakes baked into ice cream cones and frosted like ice cream) and "cupcakes" that are really an ice cream mixture piped into foil cupcake liners to look like cupcakes. I have a lot of ideas along those lines. There will be practical jokes and silliness. It's going to be fun until he's about 12 and then he'll probably think it's lame and embarrassing and I'll have to stop.

[Zoebird]

For the kiddo, we did a small family party for year one, and a trip to the zoo for year two. this year, no clue. something simple at the beach, i'm sure.

[Kat]

@Gardenarian--what you are doing sounds perfectly lovely to me. I don't see any reason why you should be feelng guilty.
@stella--the planet cakes sound awesome!

I never really got to have parties, which was fine by me because even as a child, I was not the kind of person who liked being the center of attention. I'm not very social, I guess. But we always got to pick what we wanted for dinner (at home, not at a restaurant) and got a nice homemade cake and a couple of gifts. That is what I plan to do with my kids, maybe adding another special tradition or two.

If my kids get older and want to have parties, I think we will do one every other year. Family celebration one year, friend celebration the next year. I have a friend that does this, and it works out well for her.

[Rosemary]

My birthdays growing up were similar to Kat's.

I've had parties for my DD most years. She turned 8 this spring. Her 7th birthday party really wore me out - just the typical (for us) 2-hour at-home event, with about 6 other girls, decorating homemade cupcakes, playing games, crafting, etc - but that year I noticed that the charm of the simple at-home party wasn't working for some of the kids who were apparently accustomed to more. One of the children in particular had really dreadful manners and I decided that day that we were doing something else for DD's 8th birthday. When I got an email last winter for half-price tickets to a special event that happened to be a week after her birthday, I asked DD if she wanted to go to it for her birthday, and take along one friend. She was excited about that, and it worked out really well. We had our usual family party at home on her birthday, and I froze a few extra cupcakes which I took along to the event with her friend. As for next year - not sure yet what we will do.

[Zoebird]

it's nice being in NZ. no $10,000 parties like there used to be in our old neighborhood. And yes, I'm serious. It was fairly common to rent bouncy what nots, ponies and petting zoos, princess costuming companies and photogrpahers, and on and on for 2 yr old birthday parties. Truly, it was unbelievable.

more middle-lower income families still did "outting" type parties -- rock climbing, crafting places (pottery usually), or other similar activities. still, way more money.

here, the most common party is a park or someone's home plus a picnic. that's it. NICE. kids don't expect more for their own parties or anyone else's. it's like being "back in the day" here. :D my kid can even run naked on the beach!

[mags.bubble]

Zoebird - that sounds lovely.

On the day of their bdays, my dh & I take out each child (we have 3) on their own for dinner at the restaurant of their choosing. It may be the only time the kids have time alone with both parents! At the dinner, we give them a present of a hard cover book. We then come home for ice cream pie (homemade with ice cream & topping chosen by the birthday child). Siblings & grandparents join us for dessert whenever possible.

We do sometimes do parties. We actually give the kids the choice of either a party or gift. Basically, if we throw them the party that is our gift to them. In the past they have skipped the party and chosen a gift such as a nintendo ds, harry potter lego castle, lego star wars AT AT walker, etc.....

[Bastelmutti]

I grew up with mostly family parties, but we do throw parties for our kids - mostly homemade stuff like a craft party, movie & sleepover, science party, detective party, etc. One of our DD's parties the past few years have been a few hours at a park with games and food. The other DD has a cold-weather b-day, so hers are usually sleepovers w/ taco bar & ice cream sundae bar (best friend has celiac) with the same group of friends.

[Bastelmutti]

We do sometimes do parties. We actually give the kids the choice of either a party or gift. Basically, if we throw them the party that is our gift to them. In the past they have skipped the party and chosen a gift such as a nintendo ds, harry potter lego castle, lego star wars AT AT walker, etc.....

That's a good idea. Last year, DD got to take a short weekend trip with me - I had a conference, and she hung out with a friend. That was her b-day present since it involved a plane ticket, so we didn't do a separate party.