Zoe Girl
8-28-11, 5:16pm
So my 14 yo son wants to choose to live primarily with me and has been saying this for over a year, however he needs support and I am still trying to find it. Of course the message being supported by me may not go so well (ex wife must have hidden agenda after all). So we have a counselor and a group where parents and teens learn better communication, and Tyler REALLY wants to change this but still does not feel safe telling dad to his face, which is what it seems to take. I talked with the counselor and he talked alone with Tyler to make sure he was getting the story from him, and after their session he felt he could support improved communication but not what Tyler wanted to say and him not living with dad. We have already been through this with the older sisters and it was brutal emotionally.
I understand that from a clinical sense, and i don't want to put the counselor in the middle too much, but my son's mood droops extremely when it gets close to going to dads. Sometimes I get an extra day by helping him with homework but now I hear even if we do that his dad calls and gets angry. I am thinking now about just paying a legal person (with all my spare money ya know) to listen to what Tyler wants, draw up something legal and just do it.
any ideas, I will make it clear that no matter my past relationship this is my son's choice without me asking him to stay more or saying bad things about dad.
I understand that from a clinical sense, and i don't want to put the counselor in the middle too much, but my son's mood droops extremely when it gets close to going to dads. Sometimes I get an extra day by helping him with homework but now I hear even if we do that his dad calls and gets angry. I am thinking now about just paying a legal person (with all my spare money ya know) to listen to what Tyler wants, draw up something legal and just do it.
any ideas, I will make it clear that no matter my past relationship this is my son's choice without me asking him to stay more or saying bad things about dad.