What would you do in this housing situation?

[Joyous_5]

Hi all,

Looking for your take on our housing situation.

We moved in August from an 1800 sf home to a 1600 sf one in the town 15 minutes away. The cost was more and we put 20% equity down--making the monthly payment about $160 more per month. Not a big deal except we've got a list of things that have gone wrong/need replacing. Long story--yes, we did have an inspection but only for the building, not the electrical and plumbing which is where our issues lie. We need a new furnace within the next 1-3 years, a water softener and some other smaller electrical and plumbing repairs.

I should note: we have contacted our attorney but it doesn't seem that we can prove that the previous owner knew of these problems--he may not have.

Anyway, we're now faced with a dilemma. The house needs a lot of cosmetic work which we had some money set aside for but with all these repairs (plus our two aged vehicles taking turns breaking down) we don't dare to put any money into pretty stuff right now.

We're both pretty stressed. My husband HATES this house and wants out. I'm not sure what our options are. I think we're going to lose a lot of money if we move now, but it will take awhile to pay off all the repairs this house needs and he's miserable here.

My thought is that if we sell the house "as is", offering money back at closing for at least the furnace, we could downsize into a smaller and less expensive place. Are there other options?

My dream is to build a little cottage/cape on a piece of rural property someday. But how will we ever be able to do that now? I've always dreamed of buying the property and a yurt to live in while we slowly build our home to keep the mortgage small.

Anyway, this is a lot of information (probably too much!) but I wanted to be as clear as possible and ask what would you do? Any suggestions are appreciated. THANKS!

[iris lily]

I don't know how extensive your needed repairs are (but furnaces are not cheap!) but my guess is that your house's needs are within the realm of reasonable, regularly occurring needs of old houses.

Your previous house--did you own it? for how long?

If I were in your situation I'd be very careful before jumping into another housing situation, and I certainly would not plan to build a yurt or anything on a rural piece of land, soon, anyway.

If you husband is miserable, what housing would make hims not miserable? Did he want to move from your last house?

[Joyous_5]

Well, the rest of the repairs (that we know of) aren't extensive--just the furnace and a water softener. Cosmetically speaking, we need new carpeting upstairs (it's gross) paint, trim, and new fixtures in the bathrooms. There are a lot of other things we'd LIKE to do but those are most essential. We did own our last home for 10 years. My husband was super excited to move on and this house is much newer than our old one so we thought it would be more energy efficient, with less problems, etc. When we are ready to move again, I think we're going to downsize a little more. Perhaps what we'll get from this (besides the learning experience) is more of an idea what we definitely do and do NOT want in our next house. Thanks for your response, it was nice to get feedback.

[razz]

Unless both of you are clear what, where, what size, how many floors, what orientation, how far from work, etc., you do want for at least the next ten years, it would make little sense to move as you would be making similar discoveries in the next house as well.

BTW, a new house is a whole new ball of wax and, we feel, often less quality than an older one but that is our bias unless you really know your builder very well.

Depending on your age, it would make sense to look for one floor, southern facing for energy efficiency and all the other considerations that will impact your life ahead
Often unhappiness shows up on something that is safe and detached while the real problems never get resolved. You didn't ask anything about this but I am throwing it in as it bears some thought by both of you.

[Float On]

Why does your husband hate it there? It sounds like because he's unhappy you are looking for excuses to blame the previous owner. Everything you listed is normal wear/tear or personal tastes, not hidden problems like they put a fresh coat over black mold to hide it or something. I imagine because of the current market you probably got a pretty good deal. I'd say slowly fix it up the way you want it or go ahead an list it if you think you can break even. And start saving for that 'perfect property' you want.

[lmerullo]

How much of a profit do you think you could get from selling this home? Unless you got a very sweet deal, there probably isn't much room there. And, since you mention making an allowance at closing, would you really come out of this ok? I think you would take a huge financial hit, and unless you can afford the loss, you would be much better served holding on to the house until you could make some profit. I know you have an automatic 20% equity, but I would give the market a little more time. Really, your situation is not one where you are in over your head and need to either face foreclosure or walk away from the home.

RE: the furnace - get another opinion first. It could be the person who gave you that scenario was just out to sell a unit. Seriously, did they have a crystal ball? One to three years? Odd. Secondly, you need to calculate your return on investment. If you are sure you will be selling, then I would delay the replacement as long as possible. Find alternatives to heat your home, like a space heater, or fireplace, etc. However, you will have to either fix before selling or disclose to the next homeowner, so consider carefully if today's comfort / peace of mind / energy efficiency are worth replacing the unit today (the near future).

Sorry to be the wet blanket, but is there something else going on - that is being brought to light with the housing situation?

[Bronxboy]

I don't know how extensive your needed repairs are (but furnaces are not cheap!) but my guess is that your house's needs are within the realm of reasonable, regularly occurring needs of old houses.
Have to agree. There's a larger issue of unhappiness somewhere. I can sympathize, because I found myself generally unhappy with our house several years ago. After some deeper thinking, I found it was a more general unhappiness with where we were living and suburban life in general.

We decided that it is not worth moving in the next few years, and possibly not before retirement in a decade. But we can go through life with the idea that we are looking for a different living situation, and know not to over-invest in this one.

[RosieTR]

Another one in agreement-why is the house making him miserable? Because it turned out differently than what he/you both expected? Because he generally doesn't like the town/city/area/type of neighborhood? Because you two don't agree on what to do when? Because he hates his job and the cost means he'll have to work there longer? Because the commute is worse than expected? There are obviously a bunch of totally different reasons he would be miserable, and it might be difficult for him to even articulate them. Maybe some of it is you also not liking something and then he gets down because you don't like it, or he thinks you think it's a big problem (I say this because it happens with me and DH sometimes. Communication solves much!). I have to wonder what things you liked about the house when you were looking at it and ultimately decided to buy it? If you have big problems that you can't deal with financially at the moment, is there a less expensive interim solution? Good luck.

[peggy]

It's only been since August you've been there. What were the things that drew you to this home in the first place? I have moved many many times and i know it takes time to feel like a place is your home. Especially if you find some problems shortly after you move in.. I think if you try to remember what drew you to the property in the first place it might help. Also if you do some simple changes, inexpensive changes to make it more yours, it helps. A can of paint doesn't cost much, but can make a huge difference. And painting is actually easy. Once you get into it it's easy. Hang some art on the walls, or even better, make your own art. Have a party, even a simple party can help you claim it as your own. Plant a tree or shrub, or start a garden plan for the spring. Think about why you moved in the first place. Moving is stressful, and different from what you knew, but if you sit down and write out an action plan, it's manageable. I absolutely know what you are going through and feeling, I've been there many times myself. But time, and thoughtful planning will get you through.

[jennipurrr]

Someone told me once to assume the cost of turning over houses (selling yours/buying another) was about 20% of the purchase price. That is the money that goes into thin air as part of the transactional costs, realtor fees, closing costs, getting the house up to snuff, etc. I am not sure what your house is worth, but that could get a lot of repairs done, rather than selling, if you think the house could be somewhere you like to live.

I also would like to know why you and DH dislike this house so much? What did you like about it that made you purchase it? My house is not my dream house, in fact I dislike many things about it, but its location is ideal, so its a give and take. As far as providing shelter over my head every day it does a pretty decent job.