View Full Version : I'm ready
to start getting rid of things. I think it will be hard. Plus my grown daughter doesn't want to get rid of anything. I would like to move out of this house and I have 20 years of accumulated junk. LOTS of it...I don't know where to start though. My experience with garage sales hasn't been good, because it doesn't seem like people want 'junk'. If I don't have tools or electronics, people don't seem interested. It's way more than just a couple of boxes to good will and the dump. It's a lot. I'm not particularly strong either. (in terms of physical strength) and getting rid of stuff. I'm even read to start letting go of books, even old cookbooks. It becomes overwhelming because some of it's too good to "dump" and yet it doesn't seem to sell at a garage sale. Moving it all to a goodwill seems overwhelming also. Back in the day, St. Vincent de Paul would come and pick up junk, but nowadays that doesn't seem to be the way it is. It's just so overwhelming to get started. I'm talking about 5 rooms of stuff (that includes the shed) more than I can physically move in my car by boxing it up bit by bit. I don't own a truck. Any suggestions for how to start?
First start with a book that I and others here have recommended previously: "Clutter's Last Stand" by Don Aslett. Get it at your library or buy a cheap used copy. He helps you get rid of clutter in a humorous, non-judgemental way. Be foreward, however, to read it with a pen and paper handy. You'll start to think of lots of places that the clutter has been hiding and you'll want to jot down places to get started.
About who picks up good used "stuff..." In my town ARC as well as St. Vincent DePaul's and a veterans group, that isn't coming to mind at the moment, sends trucks around regularly. Contact one or more to see when they'll be in your neighborhood. Good luck and get started!!
You might consider calling an auction house. they can go through the rooms and will often draw out and haul away that which they can auction. After they auction off the stuff, they'll send you a check or a bill. They'll send a check if the amount they gathered for your stuff exceeds the costs of the auction. They'll send a bill if it doesn't (usually won't be much). We got a check (it wasn't much).
If you are talking about books, objects, things for kitchen, blah blah blah plus furniture and what not -- should be fine.
When a task seems just overwhelming, I break it into tiny baby steps. You might want to just clear out one shelf or one closet. Empty all the stuff out of the closet or off the shelf. Clean the empty shelf or closet thoroughly so that it really sparkles and smells fresh. Then put back only items that are really used.
As for the daughter, talk to her about why you are cleaning all the clutter out and let her consider paying for a storage rental. (I'll bet she doesn't want the stuff enough to actually pay for storing it month after month!)
rosarugosa
3-30-12, 10:20pm
I don't know where you live Tiam, but in my area, pickups are done by Vietnam Veterans of America, Big Brothers/Big Sisters, the Epilepsy Foundation, and the Salvation Army.
If you are overwhelmed by the thought of starting, is there someone you can enlist to help motivate you? Sometimes even hiring someone to help with one room will kickstart the desire to get more done.
I wish your daughter was 'on-board' with the idea, that would be helpful. I wasn't quite sure if your post meant she lives with you and her 'junk' is there too or are you saying you can't give things to her because she has an overfilled house as well? If she doesn't live with you, and you think she can handle it, then do a walk-thru with her and let her pick 10 things she wants. Then you are 'free' to get rid of the rest of it.
This job doesn't have to be done in one day or one weekend. Start small....one drawer. It helps to put things where they need to go if you are going to keep an item or put it in a box or bag for the thrift shop or put it in a small trash bag. When you are finished with that drawer-----take that trashbag OUTSIDE to the trash can. Make sure it's gone not just shuffled. Same with the box or bag for thrift shop---take that box or bag to the front porch if they pick up or take it to your car if you are going to make the habit of taking things to the thrift shop.
There isn't a thing I own that would be wanted by an auction house. My income is low. In my past I've had a lot of personal loss, and lost everything I owned twice and had to start over. Which is why I think I've let myself be a bit of a hoarder. Adult daughter lives with me. She has her own stuff too. but when I said it was my stuff and that I was looking towards gettting rid of LOTS she didn't care for that too much. It's not taking stuff out to a garbage can that throws me. It's how to deal with lots of large items such as furniture, that I know has no resale value, and larger items and trying to get rid of it. As I said, I don't own a truck. My long term goal is to move out of this house and be able to move with a much lighter inventory. I have LOTS of stuff, so a garbage can can be filled in half a day and then there is no more room till another week goes by. Eventually, when I move, I foresee renting a container from the refuse company and using that. You have two days to fill the container as full as it will take. But I can't really do that until I know I'm really getting down to the brass tacks. I live in a small community and most of the Goodwills and St. Vincent de Paul's aren't practicing any kind of pick ups, and if they do, it's mostly for good, resalable stuff. What I have is just stuff. Old dented shelves, rusty pots, books, kitchen items, oodles of personal knick knacks, cheap vases, lamps, tables and couches with the stuffing poking out. It's not going to resell. I can physically pack up bags of stuff, but getting it off the property is the challenge. I tried to do a garage sale earlier in the year, and sold very little. After the DVDs were gone, I had a hard time offloading anything else, even solid cast iron pots.
Does your town have a large-trash pickup schedule? ours is quarterly.
Also, have you checked out freecycle.com? you can list things you're willing to give away and let people pick them up from your front porch.
Tiam, unless you have to get out of your house immediately take a breath and relax. You do not have to get all the "stuff" collected and gotten rid of all at once.
I suggest starting with one medium-sized box, place it in the kitchen or hall and begin filling it. Once it is filled close it up and drop it off at Goodwill (they will decide what they can resell or not). Repeat that process. Eventually you will find you have gotten rid of a lot but not gotten overwhelmed. For bigger things, such as junky furniture set it out with the trash (check out the bulk pick-up dates for your area, most cities have them).
Don't feel guilty about not having a yard sale, doing that isn't for everyone. You've already spent the money, it's gone so don't worry over it. Years ago I took apart an old small sofa, used when I got it, and took it piece by piece to the trash bin...you may consider doing that with things you know are heading for the landfill anyway.
Since you say your daughter is an adult she should be responsible for her stuff only and should have no control over what you do with your stuff.....get rid of as much as you want. When it is time for you to move on you daughter will again be responsible for what she does.
Best wishes with this project and remember you can get this accomplished, little by little.
sweetana3
3-31-12, 12:11pm
I would bet that there is a church, a Boy Scout group, a charitable organization that when presented with the request for some able bodies to haul stuff and an already rented truck to put it in so the stuff can go to the dump, they would find some way to help. They will not clean dirty houses!!! and they will not decide what to throw out but if the small stuff is done, they can help with the furniture and hauling already filled boxes and bags to the dump. You can talk to them about reimbursement. Local movers can also be called. They dont care where you want them to take the junk, just tell them to take it to the dump.
There is no magic bullet or no show that will come in and clean for you (unless you have a lot of money).
Jania is right, start filling those boxes and big garbage bags one at a time and piling them up. Bags can go outside so long as there is no food or other items attractive to animals. Boxes can be stacked right where they are filled. Work on one small area at a time.
If your books are clean and not musty, check with your local library to see if they take donations for use or resale. Many do this to make a little money.
First start with a book that I and others here have recommended previously: "Clutter's Last Stand" by Don Aslett. Get it at your library or buy a cheap used copy. He helps you get rid of clutter in a humorous, non-judgemental way. Be foreward, however, to read it with a pen and paper handy. You'll start to think of lots of places that the clutter has been hiding and you'll want to jot down places to get started.
About who picks up good used "stuff..." In my town ARC as well as St. Vincent DePaul's and a veterans group, that isn't coming to mind at the moment, sends trucks around regularly. Contact one or more to see when they'll be in your neighborhood. Good luck and get started!!
The veteran's group is probably Purple Heart and you can set a pickup date online:
http://zc.purpleheartpickup.org/
They take clothing, books, and small appliances. I've been calling on them frequently as I reorganize the house. For me it's been great that they're willing to pick up as little as one bag or box of stuff as my stamina isn't very good right now and one or two bags are all I can manage at once.
Salvation Army will pick up large items of furniture and appliances as long as they're in usable condition. No pet-hair covered sofas or non-working appliances, but they have also been of help to me in the past. They don't pick up immediately - I've had to wait as long as three weeks - but they do take the stuff and the movers are careful and polite.
And I don't know what the dynamics of your home are like, Tiam, but when you get a space cleared, GUARD IT. You cleared it, you get to have and enjoy it. What I mean is that I would find it most disheartening to work hard to clear space and have another family member clutter it up.
I hope you have time to work on this over time....no wonder you can't imagine how to start if you are thinking that you need to do it all RIGHT AWAY. Breathing and remembering that everything that ever got done started with one small step can help. Baby steps are how we get to finishing tasks. And all you need to be doing is pointing your attention in that direction and you'll get started.
It took you 20 years to fill the house up, give yourself time to empty it. I would suggest 1 year if you are retired and 2 years if you are working.
Start by creating a staging area for sorting the stuff that will be leaving your house. If you do not have space for one, make it. A closet, a row of boxes on the floor in your room, repurposed shelving. This project is going to take awhile, so look for a space that is both convienent to use and in-your-face to get it done.
Then go through the house looking for things that can be containers: plastic bags, suitcases you do not want, large pots and put a couple of these in your car. Then go through the house and find things that you want to get rid of and put them in the container. Put like items in each container, for example: clothes for Goodwill in the suitcase, rusty metal items, glass, paper in the bags to be recylced, pantry items in the big pot to go to the food pantry. If a filled container is too heavy for you, have the charity staff help you with it, or take it out one item at a time like you put it in.
Some municipalities have routine pick up of large items like mattress or sofas. Mine has a limit of three items per year. If yours has something like this and you have more than the limit, check with a neighbor to see if they would be willing to take some items for the city to pick up.
Freecycle: if you have this in your area, it is amazing what other people want if it is free. I have gotten rid of used tires, 1/2 empty paint cans, a 8' x 6' hobby railroad track layout. All those items were left in my garage by the previous owners of the house.
Think about individuals or groups who might want items that you have. I have gifted clothing that my kids outgrew to a co-worker who had kids 1-2 sizes smaller than mine. I have taken open food packages into the kitchen at work. Used crayons and open packages of craft paper to the day care.
Knick nacks can be problematic, but fun with a little creativity. Every time you give a gift in the next year, attach a knick nack with ribbon to the wrapped gift "just for decoration." If it fits with the theme of the gift or the holiday...so much the better.
For everything that is in your house that you no longer want, there is some indivudual or group that can make use of it. Sometimes it takes a little time or thought to find the right place for it to go.
What good advice! I liked the part about putting the container in the car and then filling it. When I drop off at the thrift store, there is always some strapping young person there to do the lifting.
I have used freecycle but I have had better luck here in NB with Kijiji. If I post something on Kijiji for free, I'll have someone contacting me within minutes...no joke. I think that some people just sit on their smartphones on the Kijiji free site.
fidgiegirl
3-31-12, 8:22pm
I have used freecycle but I have had better luck here in NB with Kijiji. If I post something on Kijiji for free, I'll have someone contacting me within minutes...no joke. I think that some people just sit on their smartphones on the Kijiji free site.
I think it depends on the area. In the Twin Cities, it is Craigslist that is the go-to site. Seems like my Canadian friends speak of Kijiji more than any Americans I know. But I have a friend who just moved and said CL is dead in her area, and there is some local site that people use.
I second Fawn's suggestion that people will take almost ANYTHING if it is free on CL. Seriously. We have given away broken snowblowers and other appliances (scrappers or repair people will grab them). Also like Fawn said, paint, old perfumes (people were nuts for them!), broken suitcases, any variety of furniture, jeez, just about anything it seems. Very, very infrequently have we been faced with having to toss something after we've put it up for free on CL.
Maybe reading into this but also I second what leslieann says about guarding your cleared space. I grew up in what has become a mild hoarding situation (worse now, but was going that direction when I lived there) and there was never a clear space and if one was created, my mother would fill it. I noticed it even at our new house when we were remodeling - we'd clean off the table for people to have one spot to sit and eat, and she would show up and plunk down her purse and pop and whatever other items she'd brought, right on the table, and suck up the whole thing. Very curious. But yes - keeping the spaces clean that you do clean out will help. And enjoying those spaces will be motivating to carry on in the rest of the house.
Also, no letting DD talk you out of getting rid of X, Y, or Z. That is another reason why the filling the box in the car idea is so good - if talking you out of it is a concern, DD won't have a chance to see what's leaving. As a child/teen I was powerless to get any object out of my life because my mother wouldn't allow it. Then years later if she went on a brief cleaning spree she'd bring out whatever item it was that she'd made me leave for her to use for whatever reason and tell me I had to get rid of it. :doh: Very frustrating.
Here's another idea - how about collecting a few small boxes and keeping them as boxes that are continually filled up. (The "outbox" concept from Apartment Therapy). If you keep them properly sized, they won't end up being so heavy when they fill and it is time to move them. Also this way you can pick through, say, one kitchen drawer as supper simmers. Even throwing a duplicate spatula right in the box if you realize it's something you can part with as you put away your clean dishes - moments like that. Little by little you can make progress.
It's cold, but something that helped me to finally part with some of my items (I was trained growing up to NEVER, EVER part with anything that could have use, and it was hard to unlearn it) was to realize that eventually, it will all end up in the landfill. In reality, everything is garbage from the minute it is manufactured. At some time, whether in 2 years or in 100, it will reach the end of its useful life, and it will have nowhere to go but to the landfill (ok, oversimplifying, some things will be recycled, etc., but for this exercise, oversimplification is good). I was agonizing over whether I should give things to Goodwill because I heard they threw a lot of their donations in the garbage, and this really helped me to get over it. I can't know if 1 or 5 or 50 people (or zero) will use the item I donate after I give it away. But it can't sit in my life indefinitely, either, and at some point, it's headin' to the landfill anyway. This has also helped me focus on purchasing less, particularly new. Not perfect yet, but always striving.
Good luck, Tiam, and big hugs. (((Tiam)))
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.