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View Full Version : I should have been Kind, WHY wasn't I



ctg492
3-31-12, 3:28pm
Yesterday we had terrible weather, cold rainy, windy, hail even once. I passed a out of shape older man with an old bike pulling a trailer going up the hill. OK I ride and I have a trailer, so nothing strange there. But he did not look like he was out for fitness. I passed him again and thought why is he in the area? He looks kinda bummie, bad of me. This went on again when I took the dogs to the park between rain showers. Then I came out of back door and he was in my drive, I said Hello, he did not respond, he was saturated from rain. I saw he was delivery phone books. Really slow paced. I felt bad, I considered getting him a hot tea, but my natural girl fear took over and I did not. I thought about him all evening, working for however little they were paying him. I thought at night fall he could not have been done at the speed he was moving. Worse yet I tossed the book in the recycling bin.
Why/When did this happen, that I would pass by another person when an act of kindness would have been best? Yet there are so many stories of bad things happening that I seldom stop for anyone or offer help. I am a caring person :( I always stop for animals. The exception is when biking on the trail if I see someone with a flat or injury, I always offer help.

Life_is_Simple
3-31-12, 4:06pm
Post on here the next time you DO help someone, and all is forgiven :+1:

ctg492
3-31-12, 4:35pm
Do stray dogs, turtles crossing the road count?

CathyA
3-31-12, 5:12pm
I'm afraid in this day and age I would have done the same thing. I think you should stop kicking yourself.

bunnys
3-31-12, 5:27pm
Do stray dogs, turtles crossing the road count?

Of course they do!

In fact, maybe more. Far fewer people will stop to help them. They need you more.

fidgiegirl
3-31-12, 8:25pm
ctg, you are beating yourself up. You know, I think there was a reason you didn't stop. We discount our intuition sometimes. That "natural girl fear" is there for a reason. It's ok. This experience will have you on the lookout for more ways to help people in the future. (((hugs)))

ctg492
4-1-12, 6:28am
I have been thinking about this man, I do not know why. I see homeless man daily on my bike rides and they do not affect my thoughts much anymore.
I have a problem with being a bit to friendly and talking to people when I am out and about on my walks/jog/bike and I have more then once gotten the wrong response. I actually last fall made a decision to stop my bubbly 'good mornings' to people. To me that sounds strange not to be all friendly, but I found out the hard way that many who are out at the crack of dawn are not morning people. They are out for time to themselves or having to walk the dog before work, not to have the overly talkative neighbor lady tell them what a great day it is :( SO now I snarle and grumble, just kidding!

Life_is_Simple
4-2-12, 9:31pm
ctg, you are beating yourself up. You know, I think there was a reason you didn't stop. We discount our intuition sometimes. That "natural girl fear" is there for a reason. It's ok. This experience will have you on the lookout for more ways to help people in the future. (((hugs)))
I agree with this. Often, we do not trust our natural instincts, and we try to talk ourselves out of heeding red flags.

There may be something triggered in CTG about this man or situation.

I have a hard time listening to my inner self, and I often discount what it is telling me, to my detriment

iris lily
4-2-12, 9:40pm
I could give you a long list of times when I wasn't kind and should have been, and those situations bug me in varying degree, but I will tell you--the situation you describe isn't one of them.

Ok, here's one for ya:

A woman came to my door asking for money for food for her children. She had a kid in tow. Did I give her anything? Nope. Did I call the cops? Yep.

Now, while I think that calling the cops isn't a bad idea (if she's really in trouble, they've got the homeless shelters and food banks identified and can drive her to them) I could have made them a sandwich. In the world of karma I think that my sin is worse than yours.

But that's not even in the top ten of things in this vein that bug me.

ctg492
4-3-12, 6:58am
I would have called the police too. That was help.