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View Full Version : A holiday escape!!


pinkytoe
11-23-12, 12:02pm
For years, dh and I have driven to the in-laws for Christmas. I think we have had only one on our own in our 32 years of togetherness.
It has been an annual source of grief as the in-laws exert their pressure to show up...and we end up giving in just to keep some peace.
Yesterday we provided everything for their TDay dinner, drove it down to their house (a little over 1.5 hours), set everything up, cleaned up, drove back and collapsed. I told dh - that's it - we have done our bidding for this season. I told him that we are finally going to have our own little holiday. I no longer care if it upsets his parents. They have other relatives who can entertain them.
I booked a room for two nights at a little place on the coast. It looks out over the bay and will be quiet and peaceful on Christmas day.
We can cook our own little seafood feast in the kitchenette and sit out on the porch and watch the sparkling moonlit water with a glass of wine.
I can hardly wait...first time in years I am excited about this time of year.
fidgiegirl
11-23-12, 12:10pm
Awesome, pinkytoe!! Sounds wonderful.
nswef
11-23-12, 4:33pm
Pinkytoe, What a great plan!
Sad Eyed Lady
11-23-12, 4:40pm
Super great plan! DH & I have frequently gone away for holidays. Enjoy! And, don't forget to bring the wine!
ApatheticNoMore
11-23-12, 5:29pm
Sounds good. Really I'd go away for the whole 2 week period, but I don't have anywhere near that many vacation days. :laff: But I hope to get away for a few days as well, now to think of somewhere to go ...
sweetana3
11-23-12, 6:09pm
It helps to have a good "no" button. i refused to drive to upstate NY in the winter for holidays because it was dangerous and truly boring and did say no for 39 years. We had maybe one or two holidays with family and did not really enjoy them. The rest of the time we spent with each other, occasionally with friends.

We did go at other times of the year and combined the visit with vacation to Vermont or other locations. Worked out much better.

Family can only make you feel guilty if you let them. I would simply say you are staying home or going somewhere or the meal will be at restaurant XX. If they complain, it is up to you to state clearly that this is not subject to further discussion as a family decision has been made. By the way, the child of the parents with the issue should do the talking. No matter how long you are together, it is not the same talking to your inlaws as to your own parents.

Your husband should talk to his parents.

I guess I dont understand how people living 1.5 hours away pressure you to do anything?
Blackdog Lin
11-23-12, 7:49pm
Oh, that sounds so lovely. I am happy for you.....
KayLR
11-23-12, 8:05pm
good for you! Enjoy your time together!
iris lily
11-23-12, 8:32pm
Glad to hear that, it's real progress!
Zoebird
11-23-12, 8:46pm
That sounds like a lovely holiday.

I plan to be weeding and gardening on christmas, then my ILs come. I'm not psyched. But, whatever. I think i can survive 3 weeks, right?

Next year, no family. I freaking hope.