Fidgiegirl's Journal

[fidgiegirl]

Hi all!

I love this personal journal idea. Almost like a blog within a forum. I have so many things over the years that I've wanted to share but they just don't deserve a whole thread so they go unshared.

Anyway! I came to SL through YMOYL. I believe I saw a newspaper article or something similar, got the book, and it spoke to me - like the celestial beacon of light slicing through the clouds.

The idea of money = time was always a natural one for me as even in my teenage years I would think of a certain expenditure and think, wow, I had to work xxx amount of hours to earn this. However, it wasn't until I found YMOYL that I found a procedure to actually channel this thinking into positive results in my life.

From starting the steps of YMOYL I began to attack my debt. Four years later I (and later, my DH with me) had paid off all $30,000 of my car, undergraduate and graduate student loans. When I first started to float this idea to close friends and family, all good people, I found zero support. They just couldn't conceive of it even being possible. Debt was just a way of life and why worry about it? It was only here in the forums and on the "get out of debt" goal on 43things (http://www.43things.com) that I began to find support for the idea of paying off all debt.

Through the course of accomplishing several of the YMOYL steps I also inventoried my stuff. The watershed "stuff" moment came when I counted up my socks - 82 pairs! What a dumb item to shift my thinking, but that's what happened. :~) From there I started to purge like mad. I have a conflicted relationship with "stuff" since my childhood home always was super cluttered and now is a full-out hoarding situation.

My DH and I are both teachers and we both enjoy the security that hanging on to our money gives us - the mental peace. While I am sure we are not pulling down the money that others are, we feel we have enough for our needs. It helps that we are both naturally inclined to self-sufficiency activities like trying our hand at home repair, or sewing, or cooking. We enjoy learning those new skills. We question what we spend on - if we really need it or if it is just another piece of junk to waste our money on, store, and wreck the planet with.

Just some of my simple living thoughts! Looking forward to sharing more of this journey with all of you.

[Stella]

Kelli, this was fun to read! I am very impressed at your debt payoff! I can relate to your comments about finding little support among your family and friends for the idea of paying off debt. I remember my mom once telling me, "D*** it Stella, why can't you just go into debt like everyone else!" :) You've done an excellent job!

[Mrs-M]

Love your journal Fidgiegirl!

[fidgiegirl]

A few weeks ago we found out that we had been excluded, not deliberately, but it just hadn't occurred to them to include us, from a district technology training. We had kind of put up a temper tantrum to be part of it. Well, once alllllll the details trickled in, it became clear why we weren't part of the original plan - it really wasn't for us. In the past, I would have just thought, "Well, we made a stink so now I have to go . . . " and gone and been crabby and begrudgingly completed the training and follow-up obligations. But this time I went to the other girl who was going and asked her how she felt, and she felt the same way, and then I went to the other person who had signed us up, and she was cool with us backing out, and so I did. And the woman coordinating us at the district was very nice about it. So glad, because I'm reeeeeeeeallllllly tired this first week back from break and because I didn't need one more thing on my plate that I'm anything less than passionate about accomplishing.

:D

[fidgiegirl]

I am starting to conceive of my brain as a vessel with a finite amount of space. I can fill it with different portions of thought. Not sure how to phrase that, but here's an example:

Over winter break, my brain was full of probably:
25% eating and sleeping and resting
50% fitness activities and plans
15% financial plans for the upcoming year
10% fun

First week back from break, it's been more like:
80% work
10% eating/sleeping/resting/recuperating
10% fitness
0% financial plans for the upcoming year
0% fun

It's like I can only have one main focus at a time. I have to know this about myself and not take on too much at once, because my brain doesn't have capacity and then something else gets pushed out. That's why over break I worked out several times and this week I worked out once.

I was letting work take too big a piece of my available brain-time this past week. I'm not talking about the time I'm physically there, but the amount of time I spend thinking about work - both at work and after work. Hopefully next week will be better. Several projects will wrap up and there is nothing any evening.

[Rosemary]

It's always difficult to get back to a routine after a change. I spent this entire week getting our lives back to normal after a 10-day holiday break. I hope to focus more on other things next week - hope your week is calmer, too.

[RosieTR]

The sock thing made me laugh. Congrats for discovering that!

[kib]

http://www.juliansanchez.com/wp-content/uploads/mt/brain_full.gif

[fidgiegirl]

@kib, I just saw this, LOL and thanks!!

I got around to starting my own blog. Not sure if I like the theme yet, but we will see. I invite anyone who would like to take a look to pop on over.

A Thriving Life (http://athrivinglife.wordpress.com/)

I plan to use it for just the kinds of things we talk a lot about over here, but more of a personal journal. We'll see. I've become overwhelmed by having a blog in the past. I start to think of all the things I could post and they grow and grow in my mind until it's too huge of a project to do anything with. :) So this time, I'm telling myself from the get-go that there is no pressure!!

[jrb3]

I am starting to conceive of my brain as a vessel with a finite amount of space. I can fill it with different portions of thought. ...
It's like I can only have one main focus at a time.

Right in one. For many of us, biologically, we can only put our attention onto one thing at a time. And with enough unfulfilled promises, our subconscious rebels and says "but you've got this ... and that ... and the other ...". Mine seems like what David Allen suggests in "Getting Things Done", two incompletions at once starts the deadlock.

This is why I spend lots of time planning during breaks, and not as much as my wife would like for me to spend with my children: get the planning DONE and not have to go back to it when it's time for work. I *like* focusing on one big thing at a time, I actually *finish* things. :~)

[fidgiegirl]

Well, lots going on in this lil ol' head of mine. Lots of uncertainty.

I am reading or have recently read or want to read soon:
Apartment Therapy
Making a Living Without a Job
Your Money or Your Life (again)
Buy It, Rent It, Profit!

We are thinking of buying rental property. We are thinking of owner occupying a duplex. I applied for a new job. I have a trip halfway in the works to Costa Rica as part of my current job. I want to lose weight. I am thinking about a side business or some other income streams. We have been working on getting our retirement contributions upped for the last three months (I kid you not - not really steadily, but still!). I want to do so many things to this house. We are not really happy here but not willing to have a huge mortgage payment to obtain a bigger place.

Whew.

It's too much. It's just so much to think about. But the fact that I am drawn to all of these ideas signals to me a discontent in my life that is deeper than I might have suspected. I think I might have gone overboard with the ideas and now they are an avalanche and I don't know which way to go with any of them. >8)

I have been looking forward to writing this post and kind of getting it all out there, but now I'm not really sure what there is to say!!

The political rhetoric about teachers is really affecting me. Both DH and I are teachers. I don't trust that out pensions are safe, that our salaries are safe, our benefits . . . and that's the reason I'm so interested either in the rental property thing or other side business. The rental property idea is far from a done deal and really, in all likelihood it won't happen because of the related expenditure of life energy it will entail and stress it will cause. But I want some thing or several things that can be a backup to teaching. Sad.

Well, will keep you updated as I move forward. We'll see what we come up with!!

[fidgiegirl]

I am drowning in ideas/thoughts. Just drowning.

We had a fantastic trip to Puerto Rico. I used a lot of the time to read (four books?), play Boggle on the iPhone (haha) and go to stunning beaches and beautiful historic areas. We loved it. Best part: it was warm. I was relaxed and in a good mood the whole time.

Now that we are back I find myself feeling the same way about home as before I left: trapped, despondent, inert . . . what is this? Spring is around the corner even though snow is still on the ground. That is hopeful. It's like I shouldn't feel this way.

I think what I do is that when we have some days off of work (as in these last few days remaining of spring break before we're back on Monday), I want to cram them full of the 1,000 things that I feel there is never "time" to do when working. In my head, working takes every minute of M-F and what "free" time is left is filled with all kinds of things I don't want to be doing, like making meals, bathing, thinking about things I want to do but don't have time to do >8) and stressing out about all of it.

What I am going to try is to really try to use my OmniFocus and Getting Things Done system that I have established so far. I am far from implementing the full system, but if I can, in the evenings after work, take on a few small tasks, at least I will feel like a few of my projects/ideas are moving forward and that work isn't the end all and be all of my life. I like my work, just not when it takes over all my thoughts and consumes all of my energy (mental and physical).

Interestingly, when we were gone I read Making a Living Without a Job by Barbara Winter. I hatched two ideas for what I think could be reasonable businesses, or profit centers as she advocates thinking of them as. I have a ton of ideas related to each, but is as to be expected, also a ton of questions to research and legwork to do to get either of them going. When we were away on the trip, it felt so promising and exciting. When I got home and sat down and started researching a little, they each felt huge and scary and completely out of reach and like something I did not want to do. Why is that? Was it being tired after a long flight? Was it being home, where reality was staring me in the face? Was it simply something that would happen to anyone contemplating starting up an income stream? Was it the fact that the dreaming was fun, but once it came time to putting the pedal to the metal, so to speak, it got real - and scary?

Today I would like us to spend some time putting the house in order and cleaning. I mean REALLY cleaning. The dust and stuff in here lately is really bothering me, and it's a perfect example of something I could have done any evening after work. But since I didn't, I'd like to take one thing off the list and out of my brain :~)

I appreciate you all!! It's really encouraging to have this place to come and put these thoughts out there and know that people are not going to think I am a nutcase for wanting to start up a business, gain some options, and all the rest of it!! :)

[fidgiegirl]

Did it! Scrubbed the bathroom walls, tops of door and window, medicine cabinet, etc. Whew. I feel so much better for having done it. It took a lot longer than I thought, but not a ton of time. It's funny how hands-on work can feel so satisfying. I also embroidered a towel for a gift. I am almost done and will work a little more now. Cake with the inlaws tonight. Not sure why. I suspect they just missed their golden child :)

[Mrs-M]

Hi Fidgiegirl. Keep the great entries! I enjoy reading them very much.

[fidgiegirl]

Thanks, Mrs. M! I never know if anyone is reading because there are few replies, so I really appreciate it.

[Mrs-M]

All of your effort does not go unnoticed or unappreciated Fidgiegirl. :) You can always count on me being a fan.

[fidgiegirl]

Hi all!

I am still developing several projects. Maybe none of them are simple, but they are all engineered to have more control over my time, or maybe ultimately I'll decide they do not accomplish that at all. First, we are looking at the rental property thing still. That I've kept up in over in that thread.

One thing I am going to dabble in is creating some profit centers a la Making a Living Without a Job by Barbara Winter. I have two chief ideas and a list of two dozen others, some awesome and some so-so. One of the main ideas is meant more to get my feet wet with a business than to be a sustainable, huge money-making model - a Halloween Bazaar. My sister and a friend and I are going to have it the first Saturday in October, probably in our backyard here in St. Paul. The idea is to sell crafts, pumpkins, have a fire going and some cider, etc. and make a few bucks. So I am coming up with ideas for the crafts and costume elements. All of us desperately want to have a business and all of us are scared. This is going to be like a first stepping stone and support group. We can figure out things like legal requirements and all that boring part together, managing time, marketing, etc. Plus we all like to craft. And if we do it right, it's the kind of thing we can do without a HUGE upfront investment.

It's amazing what setting the date for this has done to get it going, at least for me. I am thinking of real ideas that I'd actually want to spend my time making. I'm starting to think now that, hey, I need to complete one item of stock or more per month leading up to this thing or I'll be crazy and hate it toward the end as I try to cram it all in.

It's also scary. That's true, even though it doesn't seem like a one-day craft sale should be. What if people don't come? What if I screw up and the things I make are nothing they want and I'm stuck with a million items of inventory? What if people pooh-pooh my idea and remind me that it will take lots of hours and lots of dedication and I get scared and quit? (Please don't remind me of those things . . .) What if the health inspector shows up and shuts us down for having cider? Who knows?! What if?! But I have to counter those thoughts. I'm a planner, and like to have every detail just so before going ahead with something, and so to think of anything left un-thought-of is scary to me.

Anyway! Off to walk the doggie! And any ideas of items you'd like to see at a Halloween Bazaar are more than welcome! :)

[Mrs-M]

Hi Fidgiegirl! Your Halloween Bazaar has me all excited even though I have no way of attending! Wish I could be there although... I'm going to put my thinking-cap on and try to come up with some extra ideas for you.
http://th224.photobucket.com/albums/dd206/carjoy39/smilies/th_punkinscaref.gif

[fidgiegirl]

Mrs. M, you make me smile with your smilies!

[Mrs-M]

They never fail to make my day too! Fidgiegirl, I was thinking about some special Halloween baking to add to the list of things to help anchor your bazaar. I know it's just one lonely thing so far, but as things progress and gain momentum I know I'll come up with a few more ideas to throw your way. Advertising the event will be one of the most important things you can do, getting the word out (well in advance) so people have time to prepare for and schedule around it. I honest think it will be a real winner because special occasions/holidays tend to lack fun and different events like this.

[fidgiegirl]

Thanks for the idea. My friend was especially thinking about baking some things. I also thought we could have a fire going and give cider and sell s'mores or just have marshmallows to roast.

All ideas are appreciated. I was reluctant to start a thread about it but I am so tempted because the people on here are so smart and resourceful!

Ideas so far:
- Simple kid costume elements like bandit-style masks, fairy wands, flower crowns, princess hats, witch hats, veils in colors, etc.
- Decorative items like candle jars
- Greeting cards
- Natural makeup
- Secondhand or vintage items
- Grow gourds and pumpkins to sell. If can't get pumpkins to grow then gourds or small pumpkins would be easy enough. Where to get unusual seeds, I wonder?

[Rosemary]

Sounds like you're making a good start toward your goal!
You can find seeds for various kinds of gourds at Menard's. They have a long cycle to maturity, so you might want to plant them inside soon and put them outside as soon as it warms up, if you want them ready before early October.

A couple other thoughts -
Candle jars - if you do this, you might want to do some research first. I've frequently heard of these being called a fire hazard.

Natural makeup - are there any regulations for skin-care items? I was at a craft fair over the winter and talked with a couple of women who were selling lotions, etc about the kinds of preservatives they used. Most of the natural recipes you find are intended for small-batch, immediate home use - not to be put in a jar and kept for a while. Something like soap that is unlikely to spoil might be another idea.

[fidgiegirl]

@Rosemary, thanks for the tips. I was thinking about the makeup thing, and had also considered doing kits of the ingredients rather than mixing it. That way all the labeling would be done, but people could easily make their own with the ingredients (for years to come!).

[Mrs-M]

Fidgiegirl. I was hoping to bombard you with a slew of ideas for your bazaar, but as it happens I'm trying to come up with unique and quality ideas for you and I just thought of another, paper-craft and Origami Halloween window decorations. (I'd look for designs that are 3D like).

Like this http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSz-iD5-tA7yi93Q6Clng_-Uj61pXLDn0UhA2XnmheSTkg1HBnU1Q&t=1

And like this http://cdn.papermodelz.info/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/halloween_paper_craft.jpg

[fidgiegirl]

So cute!!

Today someone was asking what is a Halloween Bazaar and seemed baffled by the whole concept. I was so surprised!! Perhaps a different name?

[Mrs-M]

I say keep the name- Halloween Bazaar. Golly, as a kid EVERYTHING was a Bazaar of some sort. (Church Bazaars, Halloween Bazaars, Craft and Baking Bazaars). In our eyes, if it was a bazaar, it was all good! Bazaar's meant lots to see and do.

[fidgiegirl]

I kind of wonder if once she understood it she thought it was a bad idea :( and so then she got weird because she couldn't come right out and say that. We Minnesotans are strange like that.

[Mrs-M]

I was also thinking, to highlight your event (the event), a great big black cauldron in your front yard and find a supplier of dry ice. You wouldn't require a lot of dry ice, maybe a half-sized brick piece to put inside the cauldron to fog. How spooky and Halloweeny would that be!

Like this http://www.abcicehouse.com/pictures/cauldron.jpg

And you could back-light the cauldron (inside or out) to further add to the special effects of it. You'd have the best darn gathering around!

[fidgiegirl]

That would be super cool!!!!!

[fidgiegirl]

I found out about an exciting posting in our district today - Instructional Coach for Technology. It is a one year grant-funded position. That is exciting to me because if it turns out it is not for me then I can go back to my current position, rather than completely quitting my current job, which I like but is starting to get old.

The idea of doing something fresh and something that I believe has so much power to influence kids' learning is so energizing!! And all I know is the title - haven't even managed to get my hands on a description yet and the posting isn't up - and I'm this pumped. I want to start on my application materials right now, but it's silly to start without having seen the posting.

[Rosemary]

Sounds like a great opportunity! Good luck!

[Mrs-M]

Fingers are crossed for you Fidgiegirl! Go Fidgiegirl go! http://th167.photobucket.com/albums/u127/AHarbin88/Smileys/th_thththcutecheerleader.gif

[fidgiegirl]

:D:D:D

:thankyou::thankyou::thankyou:

[fidgiegirl]

Wow, life feels really topsy turvy right now. I am going to go for this other job at my school district, plus we have an offer in on a house (who knows how long that will take? short sale . . .), we are looking at starting a business and I am meeting with a mentor tomorrow, we may rent our house if we get the other house but we won't know for weeks or months, I am taking a trip to Costa Rica for three weeks this summer but have no other summer plans (because everything is up in the air!). Whew. It's a lot. But it's exciting. I hate the uncertainty but love the possibilities. We have learned a lot in the last few weeks/months.

Funny, I thought I had so much to say about it but I guess in the end I really didn't! Just wanted to get an update out there! :D

[fidgiegirl]

I just submitted the job app. I held my husband's hand as I pressed "submit." Whew!! I am most nervous to not get an interview or not be chosen, because I have worked with the people who are hiring before, so I feel like it would be a big blow. But I put myself out there, so here's hoping!!

:+1:

[fidgiegirl]

Hi all!!

Super excited about two things. One is that after a conversation at work today I am feeling quite, quite confident about the job I wrote about a few weeks ago. There was cheering when someone discovered I had applied . . . well, that's always welcome! :D It would be an expansion of some duties I have now and with the option to return to my classroom after the year is up (it's a temporary, grant-funded position).

Secondly, we have launched an eBay on Consignment business. Here is the website if you are interested in taking a peek: http://singletonsellsstuff.weebly.com This is the first of several multiple profit centers I hope to get up and running. I am just over the moon with Making a Living Without a Job by Barbara Winter. For the first time, I feel like I can and should start one or several businesses. This is just one of them! I would like to be able to leave a 9-5 at some point in the next five years.

Life is really exciting right now! Loving the challenge of creating some change and putting some ideas into action.

[Mrs-M]

Great to hear Fidgiegirl! (Sending positive thoughts your way)! What a great new business venture you've started! You're going to have to post an update or two for us after things get going to let us all know how things are working out you. Till then, will be keeping you in my thoughts. :)

[fidgiegirl]

Think good thoughts, please, for my interview tomorrow. I am a little nervous but confident overall. Should really arrange my outfit tonight.

[leslieann]

Best wishes, fidgiegirl...hope you learn a lot and that it goes well.

[Mrs-M]

Many good thoughts your way.

[Rosemary]

Good luck! Wishing you well.

[fidgiegirl]

Thanks for the well wishes. The interview went really well and I'm fairly confident I will be offered a position. So that's the good news.

Then about an hour after the interview I found out my Grammy in Pennsylvania might be dying. She is pretty dang sick, they think she had a heart attack a few days ago and has pneumonia. My dad is flying out tomorrow. My sister and I will wait to hear until tomorrow night but we may go.

So! A day of much up and down. Thus: :) and :(

[Mrs-M]

Comforting thoughts your way Fidgiegirl. As far as the interview goes, we're all rooting for you.

[Rosemary]

I'm so sorry about your grandmother, Fidgie!

[fidgiegirl]

Hi all!!

Well, I'm back from my great trip to Costa Rica. I kept a professional blog, but some things couldn't be posted there, so I wanted to reflect on them here.

I was there for 20 days total. The purpose was to visit a school that's been involved in projects with schools from Minnesota through a local Rotary club. I spent several days at the school. Two of the three weekends that I was there we were hosted with extended families of two of the different English teachers. That was amazing because we could see family life as it truly is. On the third weekend we did touristy things just DH and I. He came for the second 10 days of the trip.

It was a pretty frugal trip as far as international trips go. All our lodging and my ticket was covered by the school and by Rotary from here. I'm not actually too sure where all the money came from . . . I should find that out :) We had to pay for Bryce's ticket, some of our tours, and some of our meals. People who were hosting me wouldn't let me pay for anything. The people were all very, very gracious, welcoming, genuinely interested and interesting.

Looking back on it, I am seeing all roses, but that first week, I was pretty dang frustrated. Don't get me wrong - people were AWESOME. But I found it interesting to observe in myself the frustration that came from being shuttled, shuffled, chauffeured, etc. It was like I was a child. As an adult who is used to driving where she wants and going where she wants WHEN she wants, it was very difficult to just go with the flow. It sounds like I'm complaining. Not so. It would be exactly what I would do for a guest, too. I just found the strong reaction in myself very interesting. At one point I even thought maybe I'm not cut out for this kind of travel anymore!

I felt sad and relieved all at once when Bryce arrived. Sad because I wasn't going to be spending anymore time in family homes, but relieved for the same reason. It's fantastic to make new friends, but in an unfamiliar home, you are always on guard. Once he arrived, we were in a hotel and at least in the evenings, able to let our hair down a bit. Well, he's bald, but you get the idea ;)

Another thing I found extremely interesting was the family life we were very, very privileged to be invited into. I have a great immediate family, but we are not close at all as an extended family and frankly, I don't even enjoy most of my extended family and they don't enjoy me. (Hard to believe, I know ;) ). Anyway, of course I can't go so far as to say that EVERY family in Costa Rica is like this, but both of the families I had the privilege to meet genuinely appeared to ENJOY each others' company. The first family all gathered at Grandmother's house and squeezed in all the rooms, all trickled out of bed as they got up, moseyed to the beach once they got around to it, ate gallo pinto (rice and beans), eggs, cheese, and cream as they were ready for breakfast. The second family all packed into the aunt and uncle's vacation house, and the grilled outside late, played volleyball and cards together, and had a water fight.

Another aspect of this that I found so interesting was some of the parenting aspects. The kids were all monitored by everyone, and they got to PLAY. I mean, PLAY on their own. Adults were watching, so they were safe, but they were making up their own games and play, they were running, they were getting dirty, etc. I found this so refreshing. It just feels like so often (now I'm going to risk offending, but this is my perception) that here, parents hover right over their kids, guarding against every potential transgression or injury, suggesting and directing the play. And people were not nearly as into all the kid stuff as many American families might be. No strollers, no bags full of toys (1 or 2 or none), no huge diaper bags. A few electronics did come out among the older kids. Even the littlest kids ate the same food as everyone else off of the same plates as everyone else with the same forks as everyone else. I found watching this to be like a breath of fresh air. I am not a parent but the STUFF, like all the physical objects, associated with parenting is daunting to me. And the kids seemed happy! Were there a few tears over something or others? Sure! But on the whole, the kids were having a blast and so were the parents. No fretting, no stressing. Well, maybe over the 3 year old who was COMPLETELY covered in sand on the beach. Haha! He might as well have rolled himself in it. It was like sugar coating a pastry. It was in his ears and ALL over his face. Oh hee hee hee . . . and then the poor auntie would wash it off with a bottle (he was scared to go in the ocean) and he would pitch some more sand up in the air and get it all over him! There was a little stressing out there :)

For the first time I saw a family dynamic that made me think, oh, when I'm 80-something years old, I would love to be the matriarch of a family that enjoys being together so much.

Anyway! These are some of my thoughts about my recent trip. Thanks for letting me put them out there! Reactions welcome . . .

[Mrs-M]

So nice to have you back Fidgiegirl! I missed you, a lot! I count on all the regulars who frequent this forum, and when they are away (anyone is away), I definitely feel the void. Your holiday sounds like it was well deserved and well enjoyed. It's funny, but speaking of being shuttled and shuffled and chauffeured around, that wouldn't be for me either. There have been times where I've thought to myself (while watching a movie), "if that were me in the limousine I'd open and close my own door- thank you". But I've always had a strong sense of Independence from the get-go. I could definitely fend for myself if I had to.

Re: the children and the way and manner in which they are cared for, it's too bad Western culture (and society) isn't more like that. It's as if people have forgotten how to do things related to child-rearing the plain and simple way. Sometimes I think about what it would be like to do a study, a door-to-door study related to all the needless and frivolous things (baby/child things) in a typical home. I see an abundance of things filling precious space, costing ridiculous amounts of money, and not being critical or even required in the child-raising scheme of things, yet I know, for a fact, two out of every three homes would have them. Silly.

And it sure is a breath of fresh air knowing there are children, young and growing children (today), enjoying the riches of unrestricted play. It reminds me of my own childhood where we kids had the run of a three block radius around our home (at any given time), and no one thought anything of it. Today, if ones children can't be shackled, or at best, kept within the confines of a white picked fenced yard, then play doesn't exist. In a lot of ways we really are so out of touch.

[shadowmoss]

Living in Honduras this year I have similar feelings about the whole not being able to come and go and drive myself issues. My reason is personal security, as the town I live in is not safe for me (any American) to be out in alone, and I usually don't run around with the folks I work with (the other Americans). So, I take the military bus to the Capital, I take taxis with drivers I've come to know by name only, and I spend a lot of time on the computer in my room. When I went home last time I told my Mom that I would be out all night, alone, at the local Casino BECAUSE I COULD! Not sure she entirely understood, but got to drive myself there, and wander around as I wanted, alone.

[fidgiegirl]

Mrs. M, yes, children playing and BEING kids: really refreshing. :)

shadowmoss, I haven't been keeping up on Latin American politics very well, and even less on Honduran politics. Why is the situation so unsafe right now?

I thought I would offer up a few thoughts on my new job. It's been interesting so far. I am in the same school district, but at another site and in a different role and working with a new team of people. They are all very nice, but it's been a challenge to learn the procedures, some of which seem overly cumbersome to me, as well as face the fact that I have to ask permission to do things. At my old position, I was part of a team, but I was also the only one in the Spanish program. This meant I could basically do what I wanted with my own classroom. In the new position, I am one of two people doing the same job, and we are the newbies in a group of now five people. So those people kind of sometimes nix our ideas right before they can even grow any legs. If it happens too much, I will have to say something. I thrive on ideas; few of them actually come to fruition, but if they are squashed too much, I know myself: I will quit offering them up. I can see when an idea is bad, usually immediately after the idea leaves my mouth. But to have someone else tell me is hard. Also, I can work on keeping my own ideas to myself until they have taken shape a bit. But that's not my nature :). If it comes into my brain, it ever-so-enthusiastically comes out of my mouth.

I look forward to getting in the trenches with some teachers. Hopefully we can all learn from each other.

I am still getting used to the increased freedom in this job in terms of schedule and tasks, though. It is a new position and so not super clear yet what it will look like. We are feeling out the day-to-day stuff. What this also means and could be challenging for my DH and me is that I might not be done at 4:00 every day. I might have a meeting until 5:00, or 6:00. Or I might have to be there at 7:00, not 8:00. So he and I will have to learn to be flexible together.

That's all! More of a vent than anything, but thanks if you read this far :)

[Mrs-M]

I always read your Journal Fidgiegirl. :) (Always enjoy it too). Sounds like your new position is great, aside from a few changes and challenges. Hang in there, I know it will get better. P.S. I'm exactly the same as you are when it comes to being made to feel that my ideas or thoughts aren't outstanding enough. Quash enough of them, and I recoil, pull-back, and withdraw.

[shadowmoss]

Fidgiegirl: The situation for me here in Honduras is that in this small (relatively) town, all of us who work on Post are known, our habits are known. We usually, just being Americans, walk around with more money than Hondurans and are easy targets for the folks who have nothing and don't mind using a knife/gun to take our cell phones/wallets/jewelry. A certain segment sees us as walking ATM machines just by virtue of being Americans. So, I minimize my risks by not carrying much, having a cheap cell phone, and not going around alone. Away from this town I have no issues walking around. The vast majority of the local Hondurans are truly wonderful folks who have gone out of their way to be friendly and helpful.

[fidgiegirl]

Thanks for responding :) shadowmoss, sounds like you are being savvy about your surroundings. Hopefully you will be safe.

Mrs. M, thanks, even today was better.

It was great that this morning, since I didn't have to be in until a 9:30 meeting off site (went directly there), I made DH and myself omelettes, did my reading that I hadn't finished for my afternoon meeting here at home, and had a nice, relaxed start to the day. I think that kind of flexibility will be a bonus :)

[fidgiegirl]

Well, guys, the new job is going great. I am enjoying it so much, am so much less stressed and feeling much, much more balanced. I am 99% sure I will not be going back into the classroom. If I had to I would want to go to a different school or go part time. Part time would probably be an option at my old school (where I am guaranteed a position since I am on a leave of absence, but it would have to be approved and it would have to work with our household budget, plus we'd have to deal with the fact that DH can't go part time in his position, and he is stressed too), but I don't know if I would be completely content with that, either, because my DH also works there, and as I wrote in a thread a few weeks ago, I am finding much more calm and balance in being able to stagger our morning routines, having alone time with my own brain in the car, not walking in the door together and starting the dinner fight, etc. So while it may cost us more to run two cars (we used to ride together, mostly only using one car), the benefit to my mental health has been worth it. If I went back part time to the same school, there would still be some of those pressures. Plus, we talk a lot less shop. It's healthier for us to work apart, and now that I already made the break, I don't think I want to go back, no matter how much I love the school and my coworkers.

I find myself thinking of doing consulting, but not really sure how. I was chatting with my boss in the car tonight and she mentioned that she did consulting when she was younger and had her son. I kind of was picking her brain. I'm sure she could see right through me! That doesn't make me nervous because, you see, the position I'm in is only a one-year position. I'm not freaking out about it, there is always a remote possibility that they will be able to find funds to keep us on. But with three of us funded with stimulus funds that the district had hung on to from a few years ago, I doubt it. Where are they going to just come up with that kind of money out of nowhere? But I'm not privy to the inside workings of the district, and we aren't a typical district, so I have not given up hope that it could continue. I am ALSO not deluding myself into thinking it definitely will.

Anyway, back to the consulting, she was a consultant but had had a lot more years of experience and focus at that point than I have now. I do have some desirable knowledge base, though . . . educational technology as well as foreign language and English as a Second Language. So I think if I marketed it right and had the right connections, it could go somewhere. I very very much enjoy working with adults and think that I do a good job with it.

This year I hope to do as many networking type things as I can. The beauty of this is that this is good for my position, too. Otherwise I would feel too guilty. It is part of my job to find out what are the good practices going on in other places in order to bring them to our district. If it has the side effect of that I meet lots and lots of other people doing similar jobs in the metro area, and hmmm, who might have job openings in the future, well, that's a bonus.

I also want to take some of this time to think about a business and be serious about it and maybe even start trying to get some consulting gigs.

I am also still thinking about trying to get into teaching ESL for adults. Last year I applied for a full time position at a community college teaching ESL, and I see that they always have an adjunct posting for ESL. But if I didn't get a call back for the full time position, would they even look at me for adjunct? What's appealing about it is that maybe if I could get hired I could do that in the evenings as kind of a "sure thing" while developing the consulting business.

Lots of random thoughts, mainly thinking out loud. I did get the "Making a Living Without a Job" book from Barbara Winter as puglogic recommended many months ago, and I have bought a copy (gasp!) and have been studying it but got away from it over the summer.

I don't want to poison this year by only looking ahead, but want to be realistic, too. Going back to my old classroom full time would be my last choice, though it's good to know it's sitting there waiting in case we need it to put food on the table. I feel blessed in this aspect . . .

End of randomness! Thanks if you made it this far!

(ETA: I feel kind of guilty for writing this knowing that there are many out there with far fewer options than I have at this particular crossroads in time. Hopefully no one takes this as a whine, which it is not meant to be. And hugs if you are in a horrible unemployment situation. That's the last place I'd want to end up. (((hugs))) )

[Mrs-M]

Hi Fidgiegirl! So enjoyable reading this latest entry. Re: finding balance in, and contentment in, separating you and your SO work schedules and even workplace homes from one another, I totally agree! Togetherness is a good thing, but not all the time. Some things constant definitely do not equate to a happier and better environment. Too bad so many couples fail to recognize this important key issue/factor

As far as consulting goes, don't complicate your way of thinking towards embarking upon that journey. (Consulting equals information). That's it! Nothing more. So, find your area of specialty and go for it!!! You are so smart and have such a positive outlook, I see the two as being all you need to guide you towards a successful venture! Focus, determination, and a commitment to see things through are all assets, and you possess each and every one of those. I say put yourself out there, Fidgiegirl, and do it! You've got all the goods!!!!! Plus, you've got all of us as your cheering crowd! And, last but not least, never let your dreams go. :)

[fidgiegirl]

Thanks, Mrs. M!!! :):):)

[fidgiegirl]

Hey guys,

I am resurrecting my journal. I think this is a great option that is underutilized on our forums. Mr. Money Mustache forums has lots of personal journals and they are interesting and a great way to throw something out there but not have to start a whole stinkin' thread on it.

For example, I am going to work on getting lots of little loose ends tied up in October. That kind of fits with the "less time online" challenge, but not completely. Nor do I want to start an entire thread/challenge about it, it's just kind of something I want to do and keep at top of mind so I can be churning fewer thoughts. So the journal is a good place to put that.

I also am working hard on tracking money, but my tracking threads have kind of died out, so would like to post that here.

We'll see!

[bunnys]

Fidgie:

What has worked for me this year is that at the beginning of January I decided I was going to keep every receipt I obtained this year for every single thing I purchased and then I was going to analyze my spending. I had originally thought I'd only do this for 3 months and then analyze it but the thing is I never analyzed it. I was always aware that the receipts kept piling up in that shoebox and having this in the back of my mind has made me spend less--much less--this year.

I am still collecting the receipts. I did pull them out at one point to analyze my grocery spending and found out I was spending far less for my groceries each week than I'd originally thought so that was reassuring.

I am really good at keeping every receipt. Even if I purchase gas and the printer isn't working on the pump, I come home and write up a receipt to throw in the box. I throw every shipping order from anything I order online in the box, as well.

You might want to try this. It's helped me a lot.

[fidgiegirl]

thanks for the suggestion, bunnys. I'll consider giving that a try!

[fidgiegirl]

Hi all

A lovely, lovely and very busy week with 3 teacher visitors from Costa Rica, one of whom stayed at my house. He was our first overnight houseguest. :) I am so glad I pushed through the week and spent the time that I did with these fun and wonderful people who do so much for kids. I learned a lot from them and always derive a lot of gratitude for what I have from travels or from contact with people from other countries that have their own things going on - some things their society has "figured out," so to speak, and we haven't, and some things it's the opposite.

I have noticed in the course of putting together the guest room a strong, strong "SHOP!" feeling! DH and I went out today and got a few things for the house at Tuesday Morning, JoAnn and a pair of running shoes for me at REI. We got all of the stuff on sale or for a deal, but it still adds up. And we're going to do a few more house projects before winter. Bah. Yet I feel like the cost is bigger to put it off! The window in the basement that leaks air like a sieve . . . better to just DO IT. For about $200 of materials (if even) we will have a tight window down there (we're putting in glass block). But it's still $200 . . . ack.

But back to the guest room . . . we did pretty well holding back. We did spend $300 on a used Sleep Number bed and $14 on a set of clearance sheets so they'd be respectable - not stained and worn - so that was pretty good. We wanted the bed so that if we change the function of the room we can collapse and store it, and it should be re-saleable if we decided to ever do that. For the rest of the room we used things we already had around the house and weren't really being used. DH doesn't like what it looks like (bright colors, a bedspread I bought in India in 2005 and never used, etc.) but it's money we still have in our bank account and it's for guests, anyway, not a place he is going to be hanging out daily. I think it looks fine. :)

I reflected on this a bit in the Frugals thread but a Mr. Money Mustache post that came up today brought it up again - it costs a LOT to be busy!! With the visitors I was away from home from about 7:00 a.m. to 7:00, 8:00, 9:00 p.m. every evening last week. It was great but DH and I bought a lot of food that didn't get used, I ate out several times that I never otherwise would have, burned a lot of gas, etc. I'm not saying I wouldn't do it again - it's part of being a good host and when I went to Costa Rica last year through the same project, people did the same for me. I'm just trying to use the example to extend to my own life and remind myself that there is a reason I limit my involvement in "extracurriculars," particularly during the week in the evening. But those are where I'd most like to put my energy, too, so it's kind of sad, and it's part of what drives me to want to pursue part-time or self-employment and FI.

Lots of internal conflict today, I guess!!

P.S. This is why I like the journal function - I wouldn't ever have started a thread around this, but wanted to put it out there. I'd encourage others to start journal threads as well.

[fidgiegirl]

I am going to take the next week or so and try to get a bunch of "little" things done around the house that have been bugging me. They are starting to weigh on my mind.

- Tents to repair for Girl Scouts & drop off & pick up next batch
- Drop of household hazardous waste that is building up
- File stuff on the desk
- Set up the Nordic Track in the basement, along with a TV to watch while using it
- Maybe some mending

That should be enough to keep me busy!

[Rosemary]

It's the ideal time to get the indoor exercise space ready! I dusted off our treadmill this week, too.

[Gardenarian]

I just finished a pile of mending - what a satisfying task that is!
I used to have a Nordic Track and loved it - I actually used it every single day! I had to get rid of it when dd was a toddler - not a good machine for tiny fingers.
Just a thought - If I were setting up an indoor exercise area I would make myself a list of documentaries and educational videos from the library to watch while using it.

[fidgiegirl]

I just finished a pile of mending - what a satisfying task that is!
I used to have a Nordic Track and loved it - I actually used it every single day! I had to get rid of it when dd was a toddler - not a good machine for tiny fingers.
Just a thought - If I were setting up an indoor exercise area I would make myself a list of documentaries and educational videos from the library to watch while using it.

Ooh! Awesome idea! Or TED talks, which I never have time to watch . . .

[Rosemary]

Magazines are one of my guilty pleasures. Cooking, gardening, sustainable living types. I get inexpensive subscriptions on ebay. Anyway - I save them for the treadmill.

[fidgiegirl]

Getting more and more excited for when we find that treadmill at the right price. Still working on clearing out room for it, and that is ok. The weather is still amenable to outdoor running IMO - it's when the ice forms that it gets dicey for me. Being an XC skiier, I'm cool with cold - it's just that dang ice that I never feel safe running on.

I had the most delightful chat this afternoon with my 83 year old neighbor. He has this front yard that pisses off all the neighbors and gets a snicker-snicker comment from every visitor to our house - it is full of 3 to 10-foot tall natives. I, however, like it. So he helped me bag all my front yard leaves today (we also mulch our beds, but have a lot hardscaping and still a little grass that I'm not yet prepared to kill, so he takes our surplus for his beds) and was telling me all about his and his wife's latest trip to Switzerland, Crotia, Turkey, Jordan. He takes at least one credit per term at the U of M ($10 per credit) so that he can continue to have access to all the library services. He's an expert in pottery and lived in Jerusalem for 15 years and was doing archeological research at that time. So interesting. And I'm thankful he saved us a trip to the compost site. :)

We spent today in the yard getting all the odds and ends taken care of: draining the hoses and spouts, putting tulip bulbs, re-routing some downspouts now that we have been here one winter and have seen how they were poorly placed, etc. And excepting one trip to Menards for a few downspout accessories, we are all set on that front.

We close on our refi tomorrow afternoon. Looking forward to having that done.

[fidgiegirl]

I had two interesting "simple living" related things happen to me today, or at least they made me think I would want to share them with all of you.

One was that we had a committee meeting with a group that has been very contentious in the past - always grandstanding, "making speeches," etc. - not listening and/or trying to address their true issue at hand. My coworker and I are not part of the curricular area that is being taught, but we work in a role that facilitates this kind of discussion. I was notetaker and process observer, she facilitated. She did the best thing - brought up the distinction between dialogue and discussion, which I had never thought about. Discussion is about trying to convince, or "throw ideas" at others to try to make your point or "win" the conversation. Dialogue is about uncovering assumptions, inviting inquiry. When framed this way, our whole meeting was completely different, and we DID get to the bottom of some interesting discrepancies in people's thinking. I think we are at a point where we can move forward.

This connects so much to what we've discussed about noticing how we feel, etc. in a given situation. It just really struck me.

The other was that a completely different coworker confided in me that she has resigned from her job. I was saying things like, "well, you have to take care of yourself, no one will do it for you" and when she was berating herself for not having done x task, "well, why would you have done that? you didn't have a need to do it just because you saw it in a workshop a year ago . . . " and she was just effusively thankful that I was saying such things. I think she is expecting everyone to be mad because she is quitting in the middle of the school year (ok, that does stink, but it's better than terrible health for the next 7 months just to make your coworkers happier) and I think she is terrified of people being mad at her. And I thought, well, I admire her for quitting! So many people would just stay in that spot and be scared to make the change - maybe even me! Even if they are getting sick from their jobs! And so I was proud of her.

[SteveinMN]

Kelli, very interesting semantic point about your meeting. You are so correct that word choice can make such a difference in whether progess is made or it's another meeting full of the same-old same-old. I'll have to remember that next time I'm in a similar situation. I hope I do. :|(

Speaking of similar situations, I applaud your resigning co-worker for listening to her Inner Self. I have to say that I pushed back the date I left my workplace simply because I knew my workload would fall on my colleagues. And, yes, I worried about the reaction I would get (It probably was not a real surprise that I left, since I had been burned out for a while, but when I told them officially, there was quite a silence in the room.) I'm guessing your co-worker felt that, too. Kind of a horrible feeling -- but so was showing up for work every day at a job that does that to you.

[lucas]

Hi there fidgiegirl,

Really enjoyed reading through your journal... it's a nice way to let people on the forum get to know you a bit better, and it 'humanizes' the forum a bit too! (I may have to start one myself!)... And I'm going to use that distinction between 'dialogue' and 'discussion' at my next work meeting! Thanks!

Lucas

[fidgiegirl]

Steve and lucas,

Thanks very much for your comments. I really do believe that the journal feature is underused on our forums but I was beginning to become disheartened, thinking maybe no one reads it anyway. And while it's not entirely for that, for me, it's still nice. :) So now I know that people do. :)

ETA: And of course, I know Mrs-M always has! Come home, Mrs-M! Miss you!

[fidgiegirl]

Today I was thinking of how many half-done projects I have hanging around and they are stressing me out. So I'd like to work on finishing the following during December and - it's gonna be hard - not start anything new until at least a few of these are done. My mind is on a basement remodel now! Need to pull it back to some of these!

- Xmas letters (have written, need to print and send)
- Make screens for windows (have all materials)
- Make dog grooming arm (have all materials)
- Make cover for dog kennel (have all materials)
- Make platform for file cabinet and reload cabinet (have some materials; need one more piece)
- Make a new batch of menstrual pads (have all materials)
- Label wastebaskets with recycle/compost/garbage cute symbols (have all materials)
- Blog my recent restaurant outings
- Print up family photos and buy frames as gifts
- Send my sister photos for her calendar production

Whew! Kind of sounds like a to-do list, but it's really about using the money we've already sunk into materials - notice all the spending has already happened. :)

We hosted Thanksgiving today and it was fun, but I'm glad it's over. With family drama it was stressful this year. We're only a few weeks away from dealing with the next round - Christmas. But in the meanwhile we can relax a bit and do some projects. :) Few evening commitments on the horizon - thank God! It's been a busy fall. I active manage our calendar commitments and we STILL felt overscheduled.

[Mrs-M]

I'm back, Fidgiegirl! :) Keep on journaling!

I've been scrambling (since the hiatus I took) to get all caught up again on the many posts and threads I missed while I was away. Seems like just when I think I've tackled all the topics I missed, find more! Like your journal!

I think, because of my poor reading skills, after a certain amount of posts/threads I read, my brain shuts down, and then it's as if I go blind.

Anyhow, really enjoying this thread!

[fidgiegirl]

Thanks Mrs-M!

You know, one thing I had happen a few years go, and I think it was Facebook that made it happen, was to realize that I was at that point too involved with different Internet sites to really "keep up" with any of them. So now I just dip my toe in the river that is the Internet, and if some things flowed by, I just let them go. It's been very liberating, and I practice it even with this site - if I'm particularly busy, or go on vacation and don't check the boards, or just need some time away, I do it, and when I'm back, I don't feel as if I have to catch up anymore. I just jump back in.

FWIW! :) Always love your comments, and would never want you to think otherwise, but hate to think you're stressed out over offering those very comments.

[Mrs-M]

Originally posted by Fidgiegirl.
Always love your comments, and would never want you to think otherwise, but hate to think you're stressed out over offering those very comments.Let those thoughts flow away. Whenever I post/reply, it's because I want to. (I live for it)! I enjoy every single second of it!

http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSQCXIZ0-M9OUEJKT-TKpDtL4N6X0o5ixjQuJ9y_kfF57ienkxvs1s7bpQ

[lucas]

Hi there fidgiegirl!

I know just how you feel - at one point I was taking part on several different online fora and it was just more stress than it was worth. Now I've cut it back to just two - this one and one other - that really matter to me and help enrich my life. I've also found that it's useful to schedule a certain amount of time for reading and posting... otherwise I find I'm sort of rushing to 'get it done' rather than just reading and enjoying the information and input I receive.... after all, being part of any community should be fun!

All the best,
Lucas

[fidgiegirl]

Progress . . . celebrating the little things . . .

- Xmas letters (have written, need to print and send)
- Make screens for windows (have all materials)
- Make dog grooming arm (have all materials)
- Make cover for dog kennel (have all materials)
- Make platform for file cabinet and reload cabinet (have some materials; need one more piece)
- Make a new batch of menstrual pads (have all materials)
- Label wastebaskets with recycle/compost/garbage cute symbols (have all materials)
- Blog my recent restaurant outings
- Print up family photos and buy frames as gifts
- Send my sister photos for her calendar production

[lucas]

Hi there fidgiegirl!

Good idea to stop for a moment and take stock of everything you've managed to get done. I feel a bit like I'm running t stand still at the moment. My move to NY is imminent, and Christmas is snapping at my heals too, and all the while I have a mountain of work to get through... it feel a bit exhausting at times, but I'm getting there... and I need to remember that I'm moving forward just fine and not berate myself for having had to put this or that little task off until tomorrow... onward!

Hugs,
Lucas

[fidgiegirl]

Thanks, lucas . . . take it one little thing at a time. When I'm stressed I find lists to be a big comfort. When I'm not stressed they stress me out! :) You should have seen the lists for our wedding and for our remodel . . . but without them, it's hard to move forward on a big project. Actually, that makes me think maybe I should do a big list for work. That list above? The greyed one is the only thing that is done! :) Anyway!

The reason I'm here tonight: we paid off the Home Depot card! Yeah! We had charged our appliances for a 24 mo., 0% offer last year. We had a year left on it but I was always nervous that we were going to forget to pay it and incur a late charge. Since we refied our house and have 2 months off of paying the mortgage, we paid it off. Yeah! On to savings, savings, savings. :)

Back to looking at the list, I need to be gentle with myself. It's dark right now, and cold. If I can make it through this month eating well, doing a bit of exercise, keeping up with the house, that's going to be about all, and it will be enough . . .

[Rosemary]

great progress on paying off the card - good thinking!

re: holiday letters to "print and send" - have you considered skipping the printing step, and sending electronically? I make an electronic greeting every year, with a photo collage from the past year, and save it as a PDF, which I send to everyone. I have to mail a few copies (for instance, to my grandmother who doesn't have a computer), but that's it. It has made my holidays so much easier, plus I save at least $20 in postage.

[fidgiegirl]

I was just thinking of that today, Rosemary. For some people it would work. We'll give it a think. I did pull out our old paper and we have enough to run our letters this year, too. We shall see. With Facebook, maybe the only people who really need the update (which is really what it is) are the people who aren't on there to see the regularly posted photos and updates.

I made some more progress on the list. Not much, and I didn't stress out over it, but it feels good to accomplish something. I put together a little rolling platform for our filing cabinet and put all the files back in it. Now it can easily be moved around in the attic if we need to do so.

So, for the month of finishing up things:
- Xmas letters (have written, need to print and send)
- Make screens for windows (have all materials)
- Make dog grooming arm (have all materials)
- Make cover for dog kennel (have all materials)
- Make platform for file cabinet and reload cabinet (have some materials; need one more piece)
- Make a new batch of menstrual pads (have all materials)
- Label wastebaskets with recycle/compost/garbage cute symbols (have all materials)
- Blog my recent restaurant outings
- Print up family photos and buy frames as gifts
- Send my sister photos for her calendar production

[fidgiegirl]

So, for the month of finishing up things:
- Xmas letters (have written, need to print and send)
- Make screens for windows (have all materials)
- Make dog grooming arm (have all materials)
- Make cover for dog kennel (have all materials)
- Make platform for file cabinet and reload cabinet (have some materials; need one more piece)
- Make a new batch of menstrual pads (have all materials)
- Label wastebaskets with recycle/compost/garbage cute symbols (have all materials)
- Blog my recent restaurant outings
- Print up family photos and buy frames as gifts
- Send my sister photos for her calendar production
- Groom the dog

I was preparing to finish ANOTHER item on the list, installing a hand shower we were given from my ILs a few months ago. We had all the parts, but DH isn't crazy about the idea so it's sat undone . . . well, I wanted it to bathe the dog with the sprayer, so I decided I'd do it. Too bad I got the whole thing in and then realize the threads on the diverter were not manufactured correctly so I have a leaky hand shower. And now we have to return the stoopid thing to a Lowe's and there are none very close to us. Oh well, on our next trip up to my mom and dad's we will. Maybe I'll get a different one at Menards or Ace. And Gus will get the bath with a cup like he has been getting, or maybe I'll take him downstairs to the washtub. Perhaps DH will get his way after all.

[bunnys]

Hey, more power to you for trying. I can't even buy a Brita water filter and expect the threads to match and not have it leak. Just bought an apple peeler and couldn't screw the handle on bc the threads don't match either. Or, maybe it's my ineptitude for doing those kinds of things.

So frustrating.

We have a Lowe's every 4 blocks here bc it's a southern chain.

[fidgiegirl]

- Xmas letters (have written, need to print and send)
- Make screens for windows (have all materials)
- Make dog grooming arm (have all materials)
- Make cover for dog kennel (have all materials)
- Make platform for file cabinet and reload cabinet (have some materials; need one more piece)
- Make a new batch of menstrual pads (have all materials)
- Label wastebaskets with recycle/compost/garbage cute symbols (have all materials)
- Blog my recent restaurant outings
- Print up family photos and buy frames as gifts
- Send my sister photos for her calendar production
- Groom the dog

Sorry, my to-do list is probably kind of boring for all of you . . . but it's a good way for me to keep track and stay dedicated to the "month of finishing."

Haha, another thing I forgot to mention . . . the printing of the Xmas greetings has pushed us to get a different printer! We bought a small Brother laser printer off Craigslist today. We need to get a toner cartridge but they are inexpensive refilled. We'll only have B&W printing and that will be fine, the most common thing we print is shipping labels for eBay. We print so infrequently in color that we just gum up our color printer and then when we really do need to, we can't. When we bought this printer two years ago this was the route I wanted to take, and we were detoured from that plan somehow . . . I should have stayed true! Oh well!

[SteveinMN]

Kelli, did you use any Teflon tape on the threads? A few winds of that could take care of a very slight mismatch (provided the threads didn't get damaged much) and salvage the operation. If you don't already have it in the house, it's cheap and available at any place that calls itself a hardware store. Might save you a run to Lowe's...

[fidgiegirl]

We did use some pipe thread tape, but not Teflon . . . the threads are pretty messed up. The thingie is plastic and just didn't get produced right, I think . . . but thanks for the tip.

[fidgiegirl]

I have a cool story of mindful living. Today I was at my old school building in the suburbs. Mostly the families go through the same processes, kids in school, sports, the big house, you know the gig. Well, I was chatting with a mom whose daughters have had a few difficulties and she told me they moved - downsized into a condo on the main drag in St. Paul! I was so impressed by this as the daughters are not anywhere near graduation, which would be when most people would do such a thing. They are attending or going to attend different schools than she had previously thought they would, so that was no longer an issue for them as a reason to stay put. She also mentioned so her DH could now bike to work. Super impressed - not because I want to downsize into a condo myself, but because they did what they wanted for their family, and didn't worry about following the pack. Just very cool.

[fidgiegirl]

Things seem so big today. The education system is so big, and it's changing so slowly - even though there are all these awesome tools and we know so many things about how children learn, we just soldier along . . . how to change any of it? Global warming - now I heard that we are to a point where ice melt in the Arctic is releasing so much methane that even if we got rid of all fossil fuel emissions TOMORROW we'd still continue to warm for 20-30 years. Seems pretty hopeless sometimes. Argh. :(

Must remind myself that in the grand scheme of Earth's history, none of this is even a blip on the radar. How's that for sowing a feeling of meaning in life?

[bunnys]

Must remind myself that in the grand scheme of Earth's history, none of this is even a blip on the radar. How's that for sowing a feeling of meaning in life?

Kelli: I don't think that's an accurate statement and I think that to approach this profound problem in a rather cavalier way will do anything to encourage others to try and solve this problem, much less cause us to strive to make a difference. It's almost justifies throwing up our hands and saying "oh well."

That said, I also understand that hearing those kind of statistics can be devastating and overwhelming and would cause someone to want to deny the situation. I know I feel that way myself.

[fidgiegirl]

I know, it was tongue in cheek. Though you did her me on the overwhelming part. It's just such a huge monster, mainly thinking about education.

[bunnys]

Oh, I thought you were primarily talking about the ice sheets. Sorry.

Hey, I feel your pain. At my school whenever the crap comes down (and you know that's daily) we remind each other "big picture."

[fidgiegirl]

Hey! The Xmas cards are ready to go! It ended up being a lot bigger project than I thought. We didn't do any last year. We'll see if we will in future years. But I'm glad to make contact with these loved ones at least once a year.

[fidgiegirl]

I am doing well on my month of finishing. Today I spent quality time with paperwork - calling about this, doing that online. You know. It takes a while. I also gathered up all the piles and filed them in the attic. I also finally packaged up all the remaining mortgage detritus that was floating about and labeled it. Mortgages can mess with one's files, that's for sure. All nice and neat again. I just need to be on the lookout for a better file box for our tax stuff. We have it in an open topped crate and I don't like that - too messy and the files fall off the little ledges they hang from.

What else? I hooked up our stereo equipment so we can use it to stream Pandora through the nice speakers. I enjoyed it all day, and found all the needed adapters in the cord box. Yippee!

Lots more to do, always, and I was pinning some dog coat patterns . . . but told myself no more new projects until some more items are finished.

Another finish will be when charity pickup comes on Friday. We have quite a bit that we've decluttered and that will go out the door. And I'm taking some freebies to work tomorrow. Those are my mother-in-law's things.

Maybe I'll list our outgoing printer tonight. That will be one more thing done.

[fidgiegirl]

Ok! I was at the fabric store, and did NOT buy fabric for a dog coat. I looked, but did not buy.

Was just on looking at Goodreads, which is far too interesting and usually prompts me to run over to the library app and request a bundle of books. Then I get overwhelmed and don't read any of them! So this time I was controlled and only requested two - a funny one (Tina Fey's book) and a serious one (Teaching as a Subversive Activity). 95% of the books on my to-read list are serious. I need a lot more funny books in my life.

[Mrs-M]

Hi, Fidgiegirl!

Re: pinning some dog coat patterns, do post a picture or two for us if/when you get a coat done. Doggy coats, are one of my animal weaknesses! So cute!

[fidgiegirl]

To whet your appetite, Mrs-M - my fave!

http://makezineblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/07/tweed-coat-opener.jpg?w=600&h=524

[Mrs-M]

Awww... so very English. Ready for a fox hunt!

[fidgiegirl]

The month of finishing is wrapping up, but we will be on winter break so I'll have time to finish up a few more details before December ends - hoping for sure to do some more sewing. My mom is lending me her serger and it's pretty dang slick. Doggy booties for two babies have moved up the priority list - the salt is out! And thick in some spots!

I have been thinking that we really have not gotten out to do much of anything this fall. I used to focus on having "mini-adventures," doing things out and about that are out of the routine - museums, foreign films, new parks, anything new and different. And we haven't been doing that. So hopefully we'll do a few things over break. I'd like to see the Brave New Workshop holiday comedy show, and we get half price tickets for being Minnesota Public Radio members. I also have a hankering to go snow tubing. :) And the Terracotta Warrior exhibit is at Minneapolis Institute of Arts. So those are all "spends" but there are lots of things we could do that aren't, too. Will continue to think on this one.

[Rosemary]

I heard from 2 friends that the Brave New Workshop play was excellent. Also heard from a friend that the terracotta warrior exhibit was, in her opinion, not worth the fee - she said there were only a few statues there, though the interpretive part of the exhibit was good.

[fidgiegirl]

Ok, thanks for the tip. DH originally really wanted to go, but then saw the ticket price and reversed course. So maybe that's one that we'll skip.

BNW is always good for a belly laugh.

[Spartana]

Fidgiegirl is that ytour doggy? He/she is adorable!! Looks just like my little girl (Latte AKA Rat Dog) except a bit darker. She's a wild thing but I do love her so. Would love to get her an "outfit" too but will have to buy one as sewing and I don't do to well together :-)!

[fidgiegirl]

Fidgiegirl is that ytour doggy? He/she is adorable!! Looks just like my little girl (Latte AKA Rat Dog) except a bit darker. She's a wild thing but I do love her so. Would love to get her an "outfit" too but will have to buy one as sewing and I don't do to well together :-)!

Nope, random Internet doggy. Here's my little guy, the one who needs a jacket or at least some booties:

http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8172/8007526366_2369bb002c.jpg (http://www.flickr.com/photos/7733846@N05/8007526366/)
Gus! (http://www.flickr.com/photos/7733846@N05/8007526366/) by fidgiegirl (http://www.flickr.com/people/7733846@N05/), on Flickr

I bet Etsy is chock full of doggy clothes - and I bet they ain't cheap, either!! :)

[citrine]

Gus is just so darn adorable! How is he doing with the bathroom thing?

[Spartana]

He is oh so cute Fidgie!! Yep, all he needs is a cute coat AND some winter booties :-)!

[fidgiegirl]

Citrine, a bit better. We have had no more accidents in the house. We have also started leaving him in kitchen rather than in the kennel and I think that helps with the anxiety in his case. He's a lot less frantic when we come home. Thanks for remembering him! :)

Spartana, he has started with booties and is so funny in them, but likes them.

[fidgiegirl]

Well, I thought I'd recap December. I was focused on finishing some things up.

- Xmas letters (have written, need to print and send)
- Make screens for windows (have all materials)
- Make dog grooming arm (have all materials)
- Make cover for dog kennel (have all materials) Moot - quit using the kennel.
- Make platform for file cabinet and reload cabinet (have some materials; need one more piece)
- Make a new batch of menstrual pads (have all materials)
- Label wastebaskets with recycle/compost/garbage cute symbols (have all materials)
- Blog my recent restaurant outingsLetting this one go, can start afresh.
- Print up family photos and buy frames as gifts
- Send my sister photos for her calendar production
- Groom the dog

We did more than this, but I'm happy to have done this much.

Also, I think with the solstice I am over my fitness and feeling-like-a-slug slump, or at least moving that direction. It's a mental hurdle, really, since realistically the days are no longer now than they were a week before the solstice - but they are moving in the right direction. I'm feeling drawn to some activities again, and will sign up for yoga and possibly a volunteering opportunity. But I have to be very mindful that when I exceed one evening activity a week I get kind of frazzled - no matter if the activity is even yoga. It's having to do something at a set time that does it. And we're already signed up for the second level of obedience, so I am still considering the other ideas very carefully.

But heydude's departure made me think about my own spot lately, which feels so boring. What he said about tearing down and building up made a lot of sense to me, and I think it's time again for me to start DOING something. So I'm thinking about doing, but not OVERdoing.

[fidgiegirl]

I am getting a satisfactory feeling from finishing up projects. Not joy, exactly, but more like lightness and accomplishment.

So for January, a new list. Good thing I didn't make a complete list in December. With the darkness I don't know if I'd have been able to then tackle ANY of it.

- Girl Scout tents returned and new ones picked up as I promised to do in September!
- Finish pads
- Sew lining for buffet shelves
- Replace velcro in jacket arms
- Complete yarn palette kit (nice for doing in the chair in the evenings)
- Sewing room straightened up
- Find my crochet hooks or buy new ones (I might have decluttered them and they are inexpensive so won't spend too much time looking). Buy yarn for starter project. (LOL this isn't really a finish! But it's something I've wanted to do for a while and I'm committed to a group that will be crocheting hats for cancer patients - now I need to learn to crochet! :) )
- Place ordered pictures into frames. Order more if needed.
- Buy and mount key hook for kitchen.
- Life insurance decision (so our agent will leave us alone!)
- Toward the end of the month - annual file/purge session.
- Wash wedding dress. Eek!

That should be about a month's worth with work - maybe a bit more. But that's ok, not on a timeline . . . ;) Remember, self: journey, not destination . . . journey, journey, journey . . . .

(LOL that's pretty counter to having a "finish up" list!)

[Sparrow]

I like your list because the things on it actually seem doable. I love lists and need to make one as well.

[fidgiegirl]

I went on a tour tonight at Bridging (http://bridging.org), an furniture bank organization that is the largest of its kind in the US. They serve 75-80 families a week! At Bridging families can "shop" for household furniture and other essentials after natural disasters, homelessness, domestic violence situations, etc. It is almost like a "once in a lifetime" kind of opportunity. Families must be referred by a social service agency.

This place stocks beds, sofas, tables, chairs, dishes, blankets, lamps, and tons and tons and tons more. What appeals to me is the human aspect but also the waste diversion aspect - I wish I could remember the number of items kept out of landfills through the reuse at Bridging but it was staggering. Furniture is big, after all . . .

I was hoping to volunteer but I think it will wait for spring. As I said in an earlier post I am easily overwhelmed by after work activities and the dog is already signed up for evening obedience and I am going to give yoga class a try again. Once I get to yoga it will be beneficial, and I am going to try the later class, which seems to be a better fit than a time slot directly after work. We can have dinner and walk the dogs and then I can go guilt-free to the class without feeling bad that DH got stuck doing the whole evening routine. However, I am nervous about two evening activities. I am not signed up yet for yoga and might yet skip it, or sign up for the spring section. But I need the exercise so bad and it's not happening on my own! Still thinking about it, ultimately, I guess.

As for my finishing, not much, but every little bit counts:
- Girl Scout tents returned and new ones picked up as I promised to do in September!
- Finish pads
- Sew lining for buffet shelves
- Replace velcro in jacket arms
- Complete yarn palette kit (nice for doing in the chair in the evenings)
- Sewing room straightened up
- Find my crochet hooks or buy new ones. Buy yarn for starter project.
- Place ordered pictures into frames. Order more if needed.
- Buy and mount key hook for kitchen.
- Life insurance decision (so our agent will leave us alone!)
- Toward the end of the month - annual file/purge session.
- Wash wedding dress. Eek!

[fidgiegirl]

Major score in the finishing department tonight. My life is already feeling lighter. All the repairs are made on the 3 Girl Scout tents. Whew. I will drop them off and if they don't have any more there right now, I'll wait until spring to push for them. I enjoy it, but don't want to just add it back on to my list.

I was feeling overwhelmed and looking around my craft room and starting to panic, which would typically result in nothing being done. But I pictured this list mentally, and told myself to focus on one thing (the tents) because they would yield a big result (3 BIG tents just laying around in a pile in my craft room and living room (!) is not really a peaceful thing). Sigh . . . . ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Can't return until Monday because one of the repairs involved glue.

- Girl Scout tents repaired and returned and new ones picked up as I promised to do in September!
- Finish pads
- Sew lining for buffet shelves
- Replace velcro in jacket arms
- Complete yarn palette kit (nice for doing in the chair in the evenings)
- Sewing room straightened up
- Find my crochet hooks or buy new ones. Buy yarn for starter project.
- Place ordered pictures into frames. Order more if needed.
- Buy and mount key hook for kitchen.
- Life insurance decision (so our agent will leave us alone!)
- Toward the end of the month - annual file/purge session.
- Wash wedding dress. Eek!

[Tussiemussies]

Great that you finished the tents. I can imagine how cumbersome it would be to have them in a craft room! I'm sure they appreciated all your work. It was really nice of you to do that!
:)

[fidgiegirl]

Hugs, Tussie . . .

[fidgiegirl]

- Girl Scout tents repaired and returned and new ones picked up as I promised to do in September!
- Finish pads
- Sew lining for buffet shelves
- Replace velcro in jacket arms
- Complete yarn palette kit (nice for doing in the chair in the evenings)
- Sewing room straightened up
- Find my crochet hooks or buy new ones. Buy yarn for starter project.
- Place ordered pictures into frames. Order more if needed. I used pics I'd already had printed up a long time ago.
- Buy and mount key hook for kitchen.
- Life insurance decision (so our agent will leave us alone!)
- Toward the end of the month - annual file/purge session.
- Wash wedding dress. Eek!

[Tussiemussies]

- Girl Scout tents repaired and returned and new ones picked up as I promised to do in September!
- Finish pads
- Sew lining for buffet shelves
- Replace velcro in jacket arms
- Complete yarn palette kit (nice for doing in the chair in the evenings)
- Sewing room straightened up
- Find my crochet hooks or buy new ones. Buy yarn for starter project.
- Place ordered pictures into frames. Order more if needed. I used pics I'd already had printed up a long time ago.
- Buy and mount key hook for kitchen.
- Life insurance decision (so our agent will leave us alone!)
- Toward the end of the month - annual file/purge session.
- Wash wedding dress. Eek!

For some reason the text on your post is extremely small and impossible to read...:)

[fidgiegirl]

LOL I adjusted the size so I didn't have this monster list taking up every entry! But maybe that wasn't the best idea after all! :)

[Mrs-M]

http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSAo4CjLeNANvD2_4cU9HQso7tTf7y-eunoVFjWX4MswHDPVr8FbZYUgg

[Rosemary]

This is a great whole foods GF brownie recipe, but I would sub a dried fruit paste (hydrate dried fruit and then puree) for the bananas next time:
http://www.happyhealthylonglife.com/happy_healthy_long_life/2013/01/brownies.htm

[fidgiegirl]

Ooh Rosemary, thanks for the brownie recommendation!

I brought the tents back tonight. Too bad the worker at the front desk always makes me feel like I'm bothering her. :( And then there was a second worker just hanging around and kind of pushing me out the door when I was trying to check on some tents to see if I was to take them with me. I wasn't, and then couldn't get them packed up, and she was just hovering, and all "I'll take care of it later," and, well . . . who cares, I guess?! A lesson learned in how it's important to be cordial and friendly always. It just amazes me when I get that treatment - not that I'm some hero, but that EVERY volunteer who walks through that door deserves polite and attentive treatment. But it's not like it's egregious enough to say anything in some kind of formal complaint, either. Perhaps it's just reinforcement of my gut feeling that it is not quite the right places to be putting my volunteer energies at this time, and so I am looking for reasons on some level.

Overthinking at this point! :D

[fidgiegirl]

Making a little bit of progress. Tonight I wasn't quite sure what to do with myself so I picked something small off the list - hanging the picture and key holder.

- Girl Scout tents repaired and returned and new ones picked up as I promised to do in September!
- Finish pads
- Sew lining for buffet shelves
- Replace velcro in jacket arms
- Complete yarn palette kit (nice for doing in the chair in the evenings)
- Sewing room straightened up
- Find my crochet hooks or buy new ones. Buy yarn for starter project.
- Place ordered pictures into frames. Order more if needed.
- Buy and mount key hook for kitchen.
- Life insurance decision (so our agent will leave us alone!)
- Toward the end of the month - annual file/purge session.
- Wash wedding dress. Eek!

[fidgiegirl]

This morning I was in a meeting for work and someone shared that at the end of the school year he plans to leave his job and go for an MFA in directing or travel for several months. I applauded, and got really excited. :) It was so cool.

[fidgiegirl]

- Girl Scout tents repaired and returned and new ones picked up as I promised to do in September!
- Finish pads
- Sew lining for buffet shelves
- Replace velcro in jacket arms
- Complete yarn palette kit (nice for doing in the chair in the evenings)
- Sewing room straightened up
- Find my crochet hooks or buy new ones. Buy yarn for starter project.
- Place ordered pictures into frames. Order more if needed.
- Buy and mount key hook for kitchen.
- Life insurance decision (so our agent will leave us alone!)
- Toward the end of the month - annual file/purge session.
- Wash wedding dress. Eek!

I also did some mending/hemming of a few thrift store items.

The finishing is coming along. I have a pegboard organizer project in my head for my craft room and also have realized that the way I have my sewing materials is not working for me, so planning to look for some pattern ideas for an organizer that will hang from a hook but will roll up when I am going to travel like I did this weekend (Fri/Sat) to a sewing retreat. That way I can see what I have and it will travel more securely than in the plastic shoeboxes I am using now.

I am feeling better at this point in January than I was at this point in December. Making plans, work is going well, we are getting the house under control, etc. I have joined a group that is making knitted/crocheted hats for cancer patients and that feels just about right for giving right now - something that is social, low key, I can work on throughout the month but it isn't a huge production of time, energy, cost, etc. I am also more attuned to opportunities to collect items for Bridging (bridging.org), an organization that for some reason is really speaking to me - you may have noticed my repeated mentions lately. :) We're bringing another load this week and I might put together a small drive at work, nothing humongous, more like a box and poster in the break room.

Also have been working on the gluten free blog - just a bit at a time, a post here or there, and little things to build up traffic. None have made a particularly big difference yet, but I will keep plugging away. I have another little business idea to offer online courses for a reasonable cost for teachers. I have a good angle with knowing both technology AND teaching. Teachers could, for example, go to the Apple Store and take a class on iPad basics. But if they take it from me, they might get tips on how the different features can help them in the classroom, or what classroom management issues they need to look out for about such-and-such a feature, etc. So I'm thinking of how I can try that on for size. We are using a system through work but I doubt it can be used for profit, so trying to think of even what kind of a platform I could use - and of course, should completely rule out the other system before I assume. Perhaps even Google+ Hangout for a "live" course but without travel time. We'll see!!!

[fidgiegirl]

- Girl Scout tents repaired and returned and new ones picked up as I promised to do in September!
- Finish pads
- Sew lining for buffet shelves
- Replace velcro in jacket arms
- Complete yarn palette kit (nice for doing in the chair in the evenings)
- Sewing room straightened up
- Find my crochet hooks or buy new ones. Buy yarn for starter project.
- Place ordered pictures into frames. Order more if needed.
- Buy and mount key hook for kitchen.
- Life insurance decision (so our agent will leave us alone!)
- Toward the end of the month - annual file/purge session.
- Wash wedding dress. Eek!

Well, I did debate starting a separate thread about "finishing," but it's not really a time of year that most people feel is about finishing things up, so I will plug along here on my own little projects. Have done pretty well not starting anything new until I cleaned up some of my mental space, but did learn to crochet and have started a hat. There will be many more things to crochet for the group I joined. Excited about this opportunity to contribute, and haven't felt that way about many volunteer groups in a long time.

Thus, a new finishing list for February. If it keeps going well, I may keep up with it, but I am hoping that once I tame the list I can feel life to be a bit more manageable.

- Sewing room straightened up. Buy, make and mount pegboard organizer. (This is a huge obstacle to getting other crafty things done. I don't even want to be in there right now it's such a mess.)
- Finish pads
- Replace velcro in jacket arms
- Complete yarn palette kit (soooo close)
- Life insurance decision (so our agent will leave us alone!)
- Toward the end of the month - annual file/purge session.
- Taxes
- Wash wedding dress. Eek!

Hey! The list is shorter, and I'm not even leaving things off! Is there a light at the end of the tunnel? I know I'll never be done with my to-do list, that's the nature of life, but it feels good to narrow it a bit.

I might even start a new project this month, depending on if we secure a plot (half plot, actually) at the community garden space in our neighborhood! I put in tonight for the plot assignments. They will have a lottery if too many applicants. Our yard is shady so this will be great if we get one. So! The planning must commence! Yeah!!!!!!!

[fidgiegirl]

I went to a beautiful funeral this morning for my boss's mother.

All the testimonials about her life - how she loved unconditionally, how she respected all, fought for justice and peace, welcomed individuals into her life who had no one to love them . . . I thought, that's what I want to be, that's how I'd like to be remembered, but what have I done in my life that would make someone say those things about me at my funeral? Nothing in particular. I'm not doing a beat-myself-up over it, it's just making me think, that's all. A girlfriend of mine and her husband (with five kids) are taking a pregnant teen into her home and welcoming her into their family. They will, in a sense, go from five kids to seven. How knows how long this girl will need their help, but they are there to give it for as long as it takes. That's amazing, that's needed, I am not sure how to do that for people when there are times it seems I can barely take care of myself and two doggies - and that's in partnership with my hubby!

Food for thought!

[fidgiegirl]

Heard some happy news from my sister today. They will be moving to the small town her husband comes from. This will allow both of them to quit their jobs (both very unhappy in them) and be closer to his family. He will work for the family business, and she will have the opportunity to start up a business as she has wanted to do for years but felt trapped as the person carrying the benefits. I am so happy for them, but also sad. We don't see each other all that often now, but it will be even harder to arrange with them living 2 hours away. Or maybe it won't! At least she will have some scheduling flexibility to do things with us when we are off, like on summer vacation, that she hasn't had in the past. We shall see. Overall, thrilled for them to finally be out from the weight of HSSJs and hoping all works out well. And a teeny bit envious that they're making such a big move - it won't be easy to go from two incomes to one, but my sister has such a cool opportunity to finally start the business (she doesn't quite know doing what yet) she's wanted to have for so long.

[Gardenarian]

Sounds like a wonderful move for them.
I'm struck by how many people have their life decisions made for them by the availablity (or lack thereof) of health insurance. Mr. Money Mustache passes over this pretty lightly, but for a lot of us it is the deciding factor in retiring, or not - or as in your sister's case, starting a business, living her dreams.

[fidgiegirl]

Well, kind of ho-hum today. Work has been strange lately, winter is sooo close to done but still lingers and we're going to get dumped on again, supposedly . . . blah, I guess.

What's striking me as weird today, for the millionth time in my life but sometimes more than others, is this feeling I have, almost an omnipresent feeling that I'm going to get in trouble for something. Isn't that strange? I'm a rule person, for the most part. Maybe it's the Minnesota "pleaser" thing. Perhaps it's a woman thing, or maybe just a Kelli thing. But I spent a good chunk of yesterday worrying if a coworker was mad at me and another coworker for having basically passed along some unpleasant news we heard that affected his work. And then I told myself, who cares? Why am I spending my time thinking about this? Most certainly coworker is enjoying his Saturday with his family, not stewing over this inconsequential news we passed along to him. Then today it was something else I was worried about, and now can't even remember. Oh well, at least in my 34 years I have gained a few tools to nip this bizarro feeling in the bud instead of entertaining it and letting it wreck my whole weekend.

We did basically nothing today. We went to the dog park, that was good, and I did some meal prep. Have been thinking more about the profit centers/self-employment/etc. lately and wondering, on days like today, if it wouldn't actually be somewhat of a disaster. Not sure I'd do so well with an unstructured life. Not saying that self-employed peoples have nothing to do - not at all. But that there is not always the structure of, yep, you know what, here's the deadline, and you're expected to be in this meeting at 9:00 so you'd better get your butt out of bed. That kind of structure. A blessing - or perhaps a curse? Mostly fear of the unknown.

In happy news, I have become involved in two volunteer-y tasks that I'm excited about. Not sure if people remember that some months ago I was feeling like I needed to do something in the community but there was no one thing I could identify that felt right. It was the wrong thing or too much commitment or something. Since then I've joined the group that makes caps for individuals with cancer (and learned to crochet, bonus) and have been enjoying that. Also we are going to have a community garden plot. The group is just getting up and going and is transforming an UGLY space into something lovely. I volunteered to help pick up compostable items from a food shelf and some coffee shops and throw it on our pile. Sounds small but feels meaningful and doable. We'll be able to meet some more individuals from our community as well. Nice.

Quite long for mostly a non-update - sorry about that! See! The feeling of "doing something wrong" rears its head again! Guess I just felt like writing tonight, and THAT'S OK. Going to do some crochet right now, I think!

[Rosemary]

I had a bout of the "pending trouble" feeling a couple of weeks ago, and it really upped my overall stress level and impacted my sleep for a few days.
I put it down to February.

Now Jan & Feb - the most unpleasant months - are done, the sunlit hours of the day are getting close to 12, and the sunlight actually feels warm again. Time to let my mental pondering dwell on more pleasant things!

[fidgiegirl]

Here's hopin'. I did spend a bit of time perusing seed catalogs today - from you! - and that was enjoyable. I suppose I could get off the computer and resume! :)

[fidgiegirl]

Wanted to get some thoughts on this: my boss is retiring. This is awesome for her and potentially awful for us, her team. She is a one of a kind who knows just how to balance freedom and guidance, who can let us do our own thing or lend support when requested, can run interference with other administrators in order to help us keep our jobs as what they are supposed to be, not what others want them to be. So anyway, it's going to be veeeery hard for a new boss to measure up. Poor new boss.

So my initial thought was that I am so glad for her, because basically, I would not want her job! So I'm glad she doesn't have to do it anymore!

But then, interestingly, my next thought was one of relief, like, oh good, now I can look for another job if I want. I had felt strongly loyal to her because last year there were two of us in my job and she had to cut one, and kept me. Plus, for all the reasons outlined above, I would not have willingly given up such an awesome boss, but now it is out of my control. So that's kind of freeing. But I was surprised that her announcement revealed that my loyalty is more to her as an individual than to the organization or even the work we have been doing over the last two years. I hadn't realized that.

I have been somewhat discontented in the role I've been in, which is surprising, because last year I enjoyed it so much. I have tried to take the bird's eye view and see why this might be, because it's just been really for the last few months - is it the unending winter? (Dear Lord, let it end!!!) Is it the particularly heavy amount of policy work we've been doing, which has not been enjoyable? Is it just that any large change is going to be resisted/need to be sold? Is it the lack of being able to directly see the results of my labors on student learning, unlike in the classroom where you teach something, and then the kids have (or have not) learned it and you know if you are making an impact or not.

Anyway, that feeling of relief or freedom to look around really surprised me. I wonder if it means anything, or if I am just in a downswing in the inevitable ups and downs of any job.

One great thing about education is that you have a guaranteed job for a year at a time. That's also the hard thing. I can take a chance on trying something new somewhere else, or take a chance on staying, knowing that it will never be the same (of course, it could always be better!). And no matter what the choice/chance taken, it's for a whole year. Sometimes other opportunities come up during the school year, but not too often. So it's not like other industries where I can feel out the new boss and then change if I don't like it.

[Tammy]

To add a different perspective, education runs on a school year, like you said. So there is a natural time to resign and move on. In other jobs, there is never a natural time. So anytime a person moves on, others are surprised and disappointed, which is very hard for a naturally loyal person. It feels like one signed up for the rest of their life instead of for another school year.

[fidgiegirl]

Hi everyone, long time no update in my journal.

I have been up to a lot lately but what I wanted to share here is that I have decided I need to have one small or large adventure every day. When I say "adventure" it can really be as small as a new recipe, crochet pattern, or a different route driving to work (hey, I'm thinkin' depth of winter kinds of adventures, here). Or it might be as big as a new skill, a trip, a new club, etc.

So since I have decided this, I went on a quest to see a waterfall that is near my house (didn't see it - too muddy and had the dogs with, but we gave it a good try), today I made a new recipe as well as drove to a school I'd never been to in order to present a workshop I haven't presented in a year, tomorrow I plan to go to my afternoon activity on bike instead of car. It might even be faster since the large portion of the trip will be along a bike trail - no stop lights or stop signs to contend with. It's amazing how close some things really are - traffic can make them seem so far because I think of the distance in terms of how long it takes to get there rather than how far it actually is to the place.

[Kestra]

Good for you. I'm not able to adventure every day, but I do keep it in mind. I find it helps slow down time, so the brain has more memories to cling to. If you do the same thing over and over, time seems to fly by too quickly, at least for me.

[fidgiegirl]

Well, I'm so shy about this and not really sure why . . . so, here goes! We're having a bundle of joy in early April!

I haven't been feeling terrible like some women, but not superb either, so haven't had much to say on the frugality or fitness fronts, but it's time to let the cat out of the bag. Plus, my mind is turning now from "oh my God" to planning mode and so I have a lot of questions for people. But for now, I just wanted to let my good simple living friends know the happy news. :)

[SteveinMN]

Congratulations, Kelli (and Bryce)!! I hope "not feeling terrible" is a trend for the pregnancy :) ...

[Kestra]

Congratulations. That's exciting news.

[iris lilies]

fidigie, that's big and happy news! I guess you'll be having a daily adventure now (see your June posting) and you won't even have to go outside of your house for it.

[Simpler at Fifty]

Congratulations. Lots of changes (no pun intended) in your house in 2014. Can't wait to hear how you apply simple living.

[try2bfrugal]

Congratulations! How exciting!

[rosarugosa]

Congratulations, Kelli & Bryce :)

[frugal-one]

Wishing you the best!! Congrats!

[Tussiemussies]

Congratulations -- such an exciting time! Glad that you are not feeling too bad!

[Gardenarian]

Wow! Congratulations Kelli!!

[citrine]

Congratulations!!! I am so happy for you both :)

[fidgiegirl]

Thanks, everybody! We are excited, and scared, and amazed, and freaked, and more . . . ;)

I decided to take a spin through the Target baby department just to check out some prices (so I can tell what's a deal on CL and what's not) while I was there on a work errand today. MISTAKE!!! I am super overwhelmed now. THERE IS SO MUCH. The stuff aspect of this adventure is already freaking me out. I don't want to have a house packed to the brim with stuff. I think we over-"stuff" kids. I don't want a baby shower - how does one even say no to these things?!?! I do have a Canadian friend who managed to at least have a shower where she requested all used gifts. That would help with feelings of impact/footprint, but not really with the overrunning of the house with THINGS.

I am hoping to post some more thoughts soon regarding budgets and whatnot to help think through some things.

Haha, you all got a hormonal panic attack! :)

[SiouzQ.]

Congratulations Fidgie! How exciting for you two, and get ready for a wild ride!

And just remember that you probably only need 1/4 of the baby stuff out there. For example, my daughter never had a real full-sized crib - she went from a porta-crib right to a twin bed (as a todler). I never had a changing table, just a waterproof pad on the floor. No play-pen, no play yard. One of my best purchases was a Kelty baby backpack (usable from about 7 months to 2.5 years (35 lbs., ) and most clothes were from resale shops. Have fun with the process of what will work for you!