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cdttmm
2-19-13, 10:22am
I am not overly fond of my current job so I've been thinking about changing jobs. Only problem...getting another job with equal "status" (whatever that means) would mean taking another high-stress, long hours, type of job (most likely). I've been contemplating shifting to a lower status job. If I were taking one step down on the status scale, I think I could manage by telling myself it's because I'm changing industries. But I'm contemplating taking several steps down as in, going from being a c-suite executive in the media industry (granted, it's for a start-up, not a media conglomerate) to being a program assistant at a community college. There is a substantial pay cut involved, which is only a minor concern. (We could be FI3 by making a handful of changes to our lifestyle. We're not willing to make them just yet so working, for the moment, is really just about covering basic expenses.) But the status thing really has me hung up...but I don't want to be hung up on it.

Anybody else gone through this? How did you handle it? Was it actually a big deal or am I making this a big deal when it's really not?

I welcome everyone's comments, thoughts, suggestions, swift kicks in the rear, etc. Thanks in advance for the help!

HomemadeChange
2-19-13, 11:15am
I just recently went through this in Nov/Dec of last year. I left a traveling sales job in the marine industry-- think yachts, beach destinations, million dollar clients etc.--- for a local retail position in a totally different industry. I took a cut in pay to make the move to a job that doesn't require my degree or minor in the least. In theory, I could have obtained this position after working for the company a couple of years directly out of high school. In reality, I wouldn't be half as proficient at my current job without going through life, college, or my previous undesirable job. The status that my marine industry job carried with it was mostly inaccurate smoke in mirrors anyway. Yes, I traveled to gorgeous destinations, but I mainly saw the inside of a convention center or office. True, I rubbed elbows with some rich and even famous people, but they certainly weren't my friends. However, I was scared, embarassed and unsure of letting the status go. What would my family think? My friends who coveted my job? I even worried what my "friends" on facebook would think. And how in the hell was I going to tell my husband that I wanted to take a nearly 50% pay cut?

To put it simply. I just did it. I talked with my husband about it and he was PROUD. He knew I wasn't happy with my marine position and didn't care about the pay cut or potential lost opportunities to "move up" even further. I told my family and they were RELIEVED. Turns out, they had noticed the toll that this traveling job was taking on me and my happiness. My friends were SUPPORTIVE and EXCITED that I would be around more for get togethers. And as far as facebook goes...who really cares when you get right down to it? :). Everyone felt good about me leaving, but not necessarily where I was going. Making a less than lateral move seemed a bit looney at this stage of my life to them.

More importantly than all of that--- I am PROUD, RELIEVED and EXCITED that I made this leap. Sure, there are moments here and there when running into someone from a "past life" during the catch up process that I get that nervous feeling again, but mostly I stand tall. I did something for myself that others originally thought was a little crazy, but it was the right decision. In the meantime, I have accomplished other goals either on purpose or just as a bit of icing. I live a healthier lifestyle by not being on the road. I see my friends, family and husband more and am less stressed and more fulfilled when doing so. My mini book designed to help other women support themselves was even published in January---a project I have been working on for three years. My marriage couldn't be better and I truly couldn't be happier. I even negotiated a raise with the new company and am only 25% down in pay, but IMO I'm 100% up in success and fulfillment.

So, I am passing along a swift kick in the rear with a lot of encouragement on the side. Yes, it will be scary to give up what status you have earned and no, that doesn't make you vain. My advice would be to consider what that status truly means. If you are like me, you will find it carries a lot less weight than you think. Bottom line, do what you know in your heart is right.

MamaM
2-19-13, 11:24am
RAISES HAND (WAVVVVIIINNNNNGGGG))))) PICK ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I too, work for the C-suite and after some moral and ethical issues cames to light, I decided my dream of being CEO was no longer in my heart. You have read my post about what has gone on recently.
I am not one concerned with money, other to pay my needs along the way and keep my little family happy and healthy. I don't mind being a worker bee and not having the authority that I carried for the past 15 years of my life. Quite frankly, I want things to be someone else's problem.

I am all new to this so not sure what direction I am heading in. I don't know if I want to stay in the medical field. I have my GI BILL to go back to school and still be here for my son and take care of things at home. I could also find something in an office and just work and figure it out as I go. I had to leave, I had to get out. My health is not worth the stress. And I will be taking home 1/3 of what I was making in most jobs I am looking at but that fits the bill for me. I am also tossing around starting my own small business, since I qualify for help as a Veteran and a spouse of a 90% disabled Vet. There are options. I think I would be better off in something more creative.

I am working on living smaller, simpler, more self sufficient lifestyle. But SIMPLE is the key for me. Sorry this is rambling but that is how I feel right now. :) Email if you want to "talk" more :)

pinkytoe
2-19-13, 12:52pm
In my work-life, I have always been in a support position (executive assistant to CEOs, directors, etc) so I have dealt with the status thing from the other side. Sometimes it is tough to be regarded as the hired help but after seeing first-hand the stress that these people have in their lives - I am not sure it is worth it. Literally, by the time these folks reach their late 50s, they are burnt out emotionally and often health-wise. My current director is so stressed that she has to take sleeping pills and then make excuses every day for arriving late. Perhaps the income is worth it? That life would never work for me - I like to leave that side of me at the door and think about other things when I go home. In my private life, I am a gardener, naturalist and artist - so I find my acceptance in those worlds where people don't tend to judge.

MamaM
2-19-13, 1:20pm
Pinkytoe--you know the OLD me so well. ;)

Yossarian
2-19-13, 1:53pm
not having the authority

It's not the authority I like about higher level jobs, it's the autonomy. Sure, we all answer to somebody, but I like being in higher level decision making positions where my job satisfaction hinges more on my own good/bad decisions than on orders from someone else. Not to get too zen on you but I think a lot of the stress can be avoided if you just try to enjoy the game and don't get too hung up on the outcome.

JaneV2.0
2-19-13, 2:00pm
I never had or wanted status at work, unless you consider not wanting the typical pink-collar "helper" job. Stress level and pay were the most important factors for me. I turned down management opportunities because they would inevitably be stressful, and I bailed out at the earliest opportunity. Whatever "status" might be, I have enough of it.

ApatheticNoMore
2-19-13, 2:18pm
I never had or wanted status at work, unless you consider not wanting the typical pink-collar "helper" job. Stress level and pay were the most important factors for me.

+1, not that I'd mind professional pink collar like teaching or something, I think I'd like it, but I do think pay and being treated better keeps me out of low paid service work, even though I often suspect I might not dislike it at all otherwise and even prefer it as well. Pay yea, benefits, and being treated decently (not revered, just not abused). You can actually do stuff with money, it's pretty clear what money buys, it's constantly obvious, status not so much so.


I turned down management opportunities because they would inevitably be stressful

I have too.

redfox
2-19-13, 3:05pm
My DH routinely turns down management gigs in the building trades. He much prefers being an hourly bench craftsman, and it suits him. I am quite sick of being an ED, because I have no support staff. When I did, it was so much better! They are two distinct skill sets, and both are needed to run things... Ah, the shoestring, poverty stricken non-profit. Soul sucking at the moment.

kitten
2-19-13, 4:19pm
Great thread. Status is so important. I thought I never cared about it - until I switched from clerical work to the computer field. I wasn't necessarily well-qualified for the jump, and I had no education in computer support. But just being on the computer team, rather than a member of the admin staff, was revolutionary in terms of others' perception of me.

I felt amazed, and a little contemptuous. The best analogy I can draw is the way you feel after losing a bunch of weight. Suddenly you were ignored, now everybody wants to be your friend. But you're the same person!

After this transformation, I never wanted to go back to lower-status jobs. It wasn't that I got a charge out of lording it over lower-rung people (never did that anyway). It was just that, for the first time, I was trusted to do my job.

I think this had a lot to do with the fact that people were still very mystified by computer stuff back then (early nineties). We've all had co-workers who mystified their jobs in order to make themselves seem more glamorous or important, or to create a sense of their own indispensibility. I now understood why this tendency was so rampant. It works!

So I didn't care why I suddenly had greater status, but I knew it was wonderful to be treated like an expert in my field. I wasn't - but "perception is reality," as one of my slogan-slinging ex-bosses used to say.

It's vital to know this about yourself - will being a lower-status employee in your next job turn out to be a big fat bummer? Again, it's not that you just want to be a big shot. It's that, if you're used to being treated with deference, you can end up in real misery in a job where your ideas and your concerns don't matter.

When I was a clerical employee, I once had an issue with another woman who was (I felt) sabotaging me, my credibility to my bosses, and my ability to do my job. I went to my manager to talk about it, and was told in so many words that this other woman had greater status than me, that everyone liked her, and that I needed to siddown and shuddup. I left that job and a number of others over similar treatment.

But as a higher-status person, I haven't had that problem quite so much. My concerns have been listened to and sometimes acted on, because management likes me and considers me valuable (although this is not at all a requited relationship, lol). I believe they think I would be hard to replace, and that fact alone makes the job tolerable. They get away with a lot, but they can't risk alienating me completely. I get SOME of what I ask for. That's been huge for me. So I completely understand the reluctance to lose status, and thanks for drawing some attention to the issue here.

Gardenarian
2-19-13, 5:28pm
How does the whole status thing fit with your own priorities/values?

I don't know about corporations, but in the academic library world in which I work there is a sharp demarcation between professionals (master degree in library science, faculty status) and technical or support staff (who may have as many years of training - or none at all.)

I considered taking a non-professional position (at a nearby museum I loved) and was strongly dissuaded by colleagues, saying I would have trouble ever getting back into a real librarian job. I took their advice and am glad I did. I may have liked the environment and zero commute time of that job, but I would have soon tired of being micromanaged and not having the authority to make any real decisions in the running of the library.

To me it is not matter of status but one of autonomy.
I make a lousy minion.

I don't even know what a c-suite is, but I work at a community college and find it very rewarding. Also - lots of time off!

MamaM
2-19-13, 5:43pm
C-suite- CEO, CNO, CFO..etc.. : )

Gregg
2-19-13, 6:04pm
It's very easy to see how status could come to be important to any of us, especially in the corporate world (what else is there afterall?). Everyone likes to be treated with respect and to feel they have reached a point where what they say matters. And there's nothing wrong with being proud of your accomplishments and whatever rewards they bring. Ultimately I guess whether its worth it or not comes back to satisfaction.

60 Minutes did a segment on Sunday about a hospital ship that cruised up and down the west coast of Africa. That includes some of the poorest places on earth so there were some pretty bleak scenes. The staff, as I understand it, were not paid any more than room and board on the ship, but they do incredible work with really, truly, amazing medical procedures. The few of them who were interviewed more in depth talked about how rewarding it was and how they hoped they would never have to give that life up for a "normal" medical career. It was pretty amazing to watch them talking about that. I love my life and have been lucky enough to gain a little status in certain circles, but I've never experienced what they have. It's good to get a little perspective.

frugalone
2-19-13, 6:34pm
Gardenarian, If you read my "another work update" thread you will see that as a non-professional library employee, I am finding I can do very little on the job. For instance, only the "real" librarians can update the web pages.

I am finding this job difficult in a number of ways, one of which is that in my last job, I had a great deal of responsibility and was considered a "professional" employee. Now I'm at the bottom of the totem pole. I'm considering whether or not I want to continue in this job--yet I don't know if I could "take it" if I went back into my former field (public relations/marketing). It was very stressful and I was miserable.



How does the whole status thing fit with your own priorities/values?

I don't know about corporations, but in the academic library world in which I work there is a sharp demarcation between professionals (master degree in library science, faculty status) and technical or support staff (who may have as many years of training - or none at all.)

I considered taking a non-professional position (at a nearby museum I loved) and was strongly dissuaded by colleagues, saying I would have trouble ever getting back into a real librarian job. I took their advice and am glad I did. I may have liked the environment and zero commute time of that job, but I would have soon tired of being micromanaged and not having the authority to make any real decisions in the running of the library.

To me it is not matter of status but one of autonomy.
I make a lousy minion.

I don't even know what a c-suite is, but I work at a community college and find it very rewarding. Also - lots of time off!

bae
2-19-13, 7:01pm
I walked away from a very high-status, high-compensation job (Chief-Something-Or-Other at one of the best companies in America), and became a stay-at-home Dad and gentleman farmer.

Which I think is a much higher-status profession, if your status is self-determined, and not based on what others think of you.


It's not the authority I like about higher level jobs, it's the autonomy.

Exactly. If you follow the Your Money Or Your Life thinking, you can have all the autonomy you want, and break out of the whole "status" architecture.

Which can confuse many people.

Tough.

puglogic
2-19-13, 7:39pm
The whole status structure in organizations is one of the factors that drove me to work for myself 16-odd years ago. The autonomy - pure autonomy - has been one of the best things that ever happened to me. I still dabble in employment for others from time to time, but mostly for fun, to "try on" different livelihoods. That irritant of "my title's bigger than your title" often drives me away....I now find it simply the most ridiculous, counterproductive thing, and I'll never play again. I respect no one simply on the basis of what's on their business card or their resume.

If you derive a lot of your self-image by being looked up to for your title/status at work, it may not work for you to simply be a great asset at a community college. I've always been interested in being a great part of a great work effort, no matter what role I played.

jp1
2-19-13, 11:09pm
Personally I've never made the change the OP is considering, so anything I say should probably be taken with at least a grain of salt. The loss of status that you're concerned about sounds similar that the issues that people describe when they retire with no hobbies or major interests to become more involved in. For your situation I'd imagine that the lower status position could work for you if 1) you'll still be treated decently/respectfully in your new position, even if much lower on the totem pole, and 2) if you have other outside interests that you've been putting off which you can now actively pursue. Yes some (perhaps most) of your old professional contacts won't get it and those relationships may not survive, but if you've got new activities or hobbies that you're pursuing I'd imagine that you would likely find new friends who are interested in those things and it would end up not mattering so much that you've lost the friendship of people who were only interested in you for your status.

ApatheticNoMore
2-20-13, 1:23am
Great thread. Status is so important. I thought I never cared about it - until I switched from clerical work to the computer field.

I felt amazed, and a little contemptuous.

After this transformation, I never wanted to go back to lower-status jobs. It was just that, for the first time, I was trusted to do my job.

I hear what you're saying but I think what you're talking about is the difference between professional versus semi-professional versus non-professional work. And I'm very sympathetic to the argument that non professional work is often not treated very well. It's the difference between how customer service is treated versus tech and so on. Quite honestly I have little but complete contempt for the whole thing, not the pay differences, that's whatever, the difference in the treatment of human beings.

But it's not mean management that actually keeps me out of low paying jobs I might otherwise like better, it's the fact that they are low paying and I have bills to pay plain and simple. But I don't consider any of the jobs the OP was talking about to be low status at all frankly.

pinkytoe
2-20-13, 11:55am
Interesting article in the NY Times yesterday about how many companies now require BAs for even their file clerks (I didn't know there was such a thing anymore). The comments section would indicate that high school once provided a decent basic education but now one must get an undergrad degree to even function in the work world - unfortunately at a high price with the cost of student loans. When did we get so damned snobby about what people do for a living?

SteveinMN
2-24-13, 4:28pm
When did we get so damned snobby about what people do for a living?
I don't know if it's that or a job market in which there are so many individuals with the basic knowledge needed for many jobs that employers can afford to set a high bar to winnow out "lesser" candidates. This country also has done a pretty good job of taking the nobility out of many skilled trade jobs, like plumber or electrician even though clearly those would be better positions for many people and many of those jobs are as necessary today as they were 50 years ago.

As for the change in status, I went from a six-figure lead position in IT to ... retired. DW (who is now the sole wage-earner) tells me often that she is proud that I (unlike many men) had not defined myself so much by my job that I devalued myself as a person without a career-type job. I have a lot to offer the world even if I'm not simulating Black Friday at work.

I think much of how you accept a change like that depends on the stories you tell yourself. If you find yourself treating people with "lesser" jobs as lesser people, then the change is going to bother you. If you accept that there is value to every job (and that some are highly overvalued), then the change should be easier to accomplish.

cdttmm
5-9-13, 7:32pm
I did it. Or rather, I'm about to do it. I left my high stress, high status job a month ago and I'm taking a (hopefully) much lower stress job at a community college. It's a part-time job, which is great for me as it means I have lots of time to garden and be outdoors during the summer months instead of trapped inside at a desk. During the school year I plan to pick up some teaching gigs at the same community college, which means that during the fall and spring semesters my schedule will be closer to full time. I'm excited about the change, but still struggling with the status change. I've been trying to remind myself that my personal values (physical/mental health, relationships with family and close friends, caring for my aging pets, etc.) are more inline with the new job than they were with the old job. Also, the pay cut is paining me a bit more than I anticipated. I guess I had gotten used to the chunky paycheck and not really having to think all that much about my spending. But I also know that more mindful spending will ultimately make me a happier person so I just need to give myself time to adjust to the new normal and I should be on track to a more fulfilling life. Hooray for change!

Blackdog Lin
5-9-13, 10:10pm
cdttmm: wow! and congratulations!

Just based on what you've written, I can't help but think that you've made the right decision.....and "status" be damned. You have listed all the changes that will give you your own "personal status" in life. A status grounded in what is truly important to you. Which is going to be much more meaningful to you than what you today perceive as status-or-the-lack-of-it.

And you mentioned "mindful spending". Yeah. For myself it took awhile, but mindful spending is the bomb. It grows on you and then becomes a warming blanket that you can pull out anytime and wrap around your shoulders and feel good about your practicality. And your stewardship. And your husbanding of resources. And your ability to face any financial crisis. It can feel real good, once you get the hang of it.

(I look forward to a post from you.....say.....in July of '14, letting us know how your huge lifestyle change has changed you for the better.)

SteveinMN
5-9-13, 10:18pm
Congratulations, cdttmm! You've taken a very big step toward living your best life.

Float On
5-9-13, 11:19pm
congrats! sounds like you've found some freedom. And it's wonderful that it was by your choice. Enjoy.

Tussiemussies
5-10-13, 12:17am
Sounds to me like the perfect life. I have seen people in higher positions not taking their honeymoon for fear they would miss something at work, they eventually got to iit but is that the way to live? Everyone at higher levels, their job was first and foremost their first priority. I am glad I wasn't in that group since living life with love is more important to me. I was able to take time off at Christmas time and Thanksgiving. Enjoyed taking my vacations too. I don't work anymore now and do at times feel bad about it but could never see myself in the workplace again. I was so glad at one job I had my dog was having puppies and I was able to leave for the rest of the day to attend to them all!


Congratulations to you. I hope your life becomes much more fulfilling this way! Please keep us informed. Everyone is different. I hope you really enjoy this! Chris

Geila
5-10-13, 1:21pm
When I left my job to go back to school we reduced our income by half and it was pretty scary. But honestly, we've never missed the money. You'll be amazed at how quickly your spending habits change when you have extra free time. We used to spend lots of money on eating out and weekend getaways because I was tired from work and wanted to escape. Now those things hold very little appeal for us. We're still able to save money and we eat really well and feel like we have so much free time.

I'm at a comm college right now and there are lots of opportunities for making more money if you end up wanting that. Online classes are in huge demand, as well as accelerated classes. But you might find that you'd rather just hang out in your garden instead :).

Congratulations on your move! And remember, if you do find that the change in status is more than you are comfortable with, you can always go back and you'll have gained the benefit of the experience. It's a win-win!

cdttmm
5-10-13, 8:07pm
Thanks for the support, everyone! I'm feeling pretty good about the change, but I haven't started my new job yet, so I guess I'm feeling good about the change in theory, but not yet in practice. I'm curious to see how the first few weeks go and how I adjust to things like having to be accountable for my hours, having to follow a dress code (it's pretty informal, but I was working from home before so...), having to actually report to a "middle manager" of sorts (my entire career I've been in situations where I reported directly to the owner, CEO, or president), and so on. I'm trying to think about this as an experiment of sorts and so hopefully that will help me to keep an open mind and to be in a mode of observing what is happening as opposed to judging what is happening. I also keep reminding myself that if I don't like the change for any reason I can always "vote with my feet" and go work elsewhere. But, overall, I'm feeling pretty positive. I'll be sure to report back periodically so that anyone following this thread and considering the same thing can read about my experience.